Believe in Miracle ways

think they are better but they are not

2011-01-09T11:52:00.000+08:00

Oh father Lord

just to have a quick write here

i pray that lord able to help me in this exam

i realy need u lord

im sorry tat i always fail u lord.

lead me through the right way lord..

i wan to be someone useful in this earth

ppl seen to put me down

i wan to be strong like u lord

i dun wan to be a weak person anymore

teach me to be one strong women in this earth

give me the wisdom to do things lord..

i really had enuogh test on everything

i feel upset at times

but no matter u are still there to bring me up

to be there with me..

ppl just dun understand but lord u understand rite..

love u so much lord..

u r the one who really understand how i feel

ppl just dun admit they are wrong..

but i do know is my wrong and i admit it

sorry lord.. pls forgive my sin..

i love u lord.. my father.. my everything

People

2010-09-18T22:07:00.000+08:00

People in life never satisfy
people just think that they are perfect
people just know what they should do
people never think that they are wrong or right

as long as what they do they think is right
never think about the what is going to happen next
of course we dunno what going to happen next
need to precaution about it

people just never bother about it
people just think about themselves
why so selfish person in this world
why such a person can live better then us

i just can't understand what is life
i just know God will handle it
God will do the rest
they will deserve when the time comes

i wan my life to be perfect but life is so unfair
accept as it is
a friend always tell me
whatever happens
just thx God
ya is really true
father Lord
it is really not easy to live in this world
however Lord i try my best to do what should be done
a wondeful life, wonderful God
because of God we are here
trust the lord..
Thank you lord for everything
in jesus name amen

A Prayer

2010-09-04T20:37:00.000+08:00

Father Lord,

i am not the one who is running away from problems

is ppl who is running from it

i say i need sometimes for myself

however ppl just dun understand

izzit because they themselves is running from it

after they know is their wrong

or they trying to get this chance running away

Father Lord,

i realize the problem now

i still have strength because of it

i still can live here because of u Lord

because no matter u r there for me

u are to sove it but ppl just dont wan to accept it

i really dunt care about it anymore

forgive my sin also to those is sinner

forgive us Lord

i wan to make a different lord

is not whether u or me

is the way u arrange the matter

they wan me to shift out..

Father Lord,

i am sorry that why i live outside

this is because i cannot handle myself there

i know if i live there my health will be more affected

i wan to leave everything to u

because what is most important

is God is in my life

as the song

we are chosen generation

God, we live for u no for other ppl

u have created us

Father Lord,

i wan to pray for my practical

i know wen i for something happen lord

u surely will make it happen n also wan me to overcome it

Lord, show me the true fren that u have given me for this college

i really wan a true fren is enough

i dun wan more

i just wan a simple fren, able to understand, overcome it, true fren, can be trusted

i surrender lord

I am sorry that i have run away before but i realize

u are the one only can help me in my life

i love u lord

hopefully i have great wisdom lord.

make miracle happen for me lord..

i thank you everything

pls forgive me lord...

in jesus name AMEN...

Have fall and realize to be a wake now

2010-04-22T22:37:00.000+08:00

Life is just so unfair

I just can’t understand

What to do this is the evil world as i know

What is life then

When the is life come

Take opportunity to do what it should

When there no life

Whatever u wan to nothing can be done

I wanted to become the best at 1^st

However I have fall

Now I knew it I have fall

I must have a chance to bring my self up

How God

How am I going to bring myself up?

Without you Lord I’m nothing in this world

Where am I going to start it again

This is life

Once only u can do

Therefore God have given the chance just take as it is

Do not make things difficult

Follow is the rite word to express on life

Follow God’s words

Follow the scripture

Follow and obey the word of God

This is life must do what is best

Must really work hard

Lead me through it

I will follow wherever I need

I feel so lost Lord

I don’t know where is ur lamb

Ur lamb have lost by itself

How can I find this lamb (me)

Be a great leader is the target

Not a leader in church or cg or even college

A leader in God heart

Do something like a leader

Leader is confident

Something like a great person to follow

Who is role model this year

The only person is God

We are not perfect in this world

We can’t follow correct way on this

Sometimes, I just leave everything to the Lord

Be a great sister in this world

miss my blog

2010-04-22T21:41:00.002+08:00

Oh father, i really miss my blog so much..

Unfortunately i don’t have the time to write my blog..

I guess is already few months didnt update my blog..

Exam and exam been coming just none stop at all.

Now is my holiday

Therefore, I fall sick

Having bad cough and sore throat and the day before yesterday couldn’t even talk

So painful cant do anything.. cant go out, cant drink or eat whatever i want

Cannot eat this and that..

Very tired of it..

Father Lord please heal me Lord in the name of Jesus..

Amen...

Father Lord, I’m sorry lord so much.. Please forgive me.. I didn’t do what i suppose to do.. have been very busy with life and college.. i know Lord life and college is God given to me.. We have to find time for it.. Unfortunately, i don’t know how to arrange my time at all.. This is the worse part that i even had Lord. Lord please bless the people around me.. Show me the way, i feel that not only me fall . Give me strength lord, wisdom and knowledge to be a great person to do a wonderful things for God. I just don’t know what am I doing and where should i start. I just don’t know where should be. I feel that im so lost in this world.

Be my valentine date for today

2010-02-13T12:39:00.000+08:00

I was mean to born in this earth
God made us differently
He put each person in a special way
He also match us together in a wonderful way

Be my valentine date for today
I want to feel what is valentine
Every year, I celebrate valentine with family and friends
This year 2010 I want to celebrate with you

Valentine is a special day
It is a celebration for family, friends and couple
Depends on how you celebrate
You can made a different for this celebration

You have told me that
I am like a princess
I don’t care about anything but I love you
I am willing to do anything for you

You are special to me
Even though, you are not a real prince
But you are the prince in my heart

What is important is that
We are happy together
We are willing to understand each other
We will go through problem together

We already been together for 4 months
I feel that we are3 different then other couple
God is so wonderful in this world
It is really amazing to be here today

Love is so amazing
Love will find each other in God’s plan
Love will made us different
Love can’t be explain at all, it comes naturally

I love you
Not because about money
It is because I find happiness in you
No matter what you think of me

I love you as you are
I pray that we are able to be together forever
To me, you are wonderful and special person
Love through Christ is a great way

What will be in 2010

2009-11-30T18:26:00.001+08:00

What is my life now?

What can I do?

What can I do Lord

I always depend on you

Until now I still do Lord

I don’t know what should do

Father Lord, please be able to help me in my life

I always depend on you

In the father name

Help me in my studies Lord

Now in relationship Lord

My studies must not affect me

Be with me Lord

Forgive my sin

In words may not be shown

In action will do the best

I can only depend on you

You are my everything

ou have shown me the way

Guide me through everything
I am afraid but I trust in you Lord

In holiday but I am very tired

I want to have some rest

With not soon will be very busy for posting

Training may not be in KL..

Might be in Muar..

I know will be a different and challenging

I hope I have a wonderful Christmas and Chinese new year 2010..

What will my new year 2010 will be..

I want to have a change

I want to be different

PA Outing

2009-09-23T18:34:00.002+08:00

A wonderful Hari Raya Holiday
This is the 1st time I go for camping at Bentong
I have learn to independent when I was outside
Have wonderful holiday with friends especially Poh Ling, Seng Tat and also Mun Kin
Is great to get to know new friends
They are very friendly
Some I don’t even know them
This is the camp from new life which is called PA Outing
Actually I went to this outing there is a reason
God knows it.. I dunno what to say

Something to believe in

2009-09-13T17:04:00.000+08:00

Finally, I have settled with the person
I really hope he can understand me
Hope that he won’t get upset or this and that
Every time, only got his talk
Even that day also I say something sure he say something
Really hurt my feeling
But never mind whatever it is I have done my part
God will understand me
No matter those people don’t understand
I am OK with it
Because I know God understand
God is with me always
I don’t think is important that he listen a not
I have done the right thing I guess

Now, have to concentrate on the semester 3 final exam is on Tuesday
My OKSI is on Wednesday
I pray that God will guide me through with everything
I just have to trust him and God will do the rest
I have done my reading
Help me to remember it Lord, wisdom, knowledge to do it
In a miracle way
Believe and ask for God Helps and seek for him

I have been through all this
Why I can’t everybody can
Something to believe in.. (God)
How to plan for the mission with Poh Ling
I know she is so excited and worry about it
Now I guess she have to start from Adam..
I just have to be with her.
Lord, show me the way how to deal with it
Thx Lord for everything..

Serve the Lord

2009-09-07T18:49:00.000+08:00

After have a chat with a leader from new life church

I decide to have a partner which the person is Poh Ling

I want everything to go smoothly

Hope everything will be fine

Guide us through it

I think I have told Joshua but must face to face to speak

Need some advice on it

We are God children no matter where the people choose is ok

Anyway I am going serve both sides

God please give me the strength

Hope that I’m going to the right track

Lead me through

Now I must a good schedule of the things I need to plan

I hope I don’t fall off just like that

I have to build up confident, life, strength and more

I want to be fire on God

I am depending on You

What Happen??

2009-09-06T04:16:00.000+08:00

Just wan to share my feeling since I have enough sleep I guess
Now is already 4am in the morning..
Why I wake up so early having headache now also
If I sleep some more I’m like a pig

Father Lord, I have an experience of the feeling fainting
On the 29 aug I was in genting for the camp DARE TO MOVE…
I only slept for 3 hours I guess
Then I wake up to study and whole day never sleep
After when at night service I was fainted during the service
The feeling was like feeling drizzle, seeing stars all around
After that, I really dunno what happen
By the time I wake im already on the sofa
Two church member carry
I have open my eyes during I fainted and
I know my feet was not on the floor
I couldn’t dare to walk I couldn’t balance myself at all
They decide to carry to my dorm
Since than I feel so sick having so much problem in my life

After camp, means was on the 1 sept I was in college
And I have so called chest pain
I feel that I have something press on the chest couldn’t breath nicely
Slowly I do deep breathing exercise only better a bit
So on the 3 sept was on thurday
I have pain near my scapula and she massage for me
Then I feel a bit hard to breath
So I call seng tat can we just go and eat and I go back but he insist me to go to church
So I went but I was having difficulty so I slept there

I did not talk to jia chuen since Wednesday
That morning is the last talk I talk to him
He is so not matured sometimes
I cannot accept it already
I think I have enough patience with him

On Friday I went my own cell group
I was having back pain but everything was fine at that time
Was talking to my leader
But when they started to worship
I feel very uncomfortable
Hard to breath (SOB) shortness of breath
Then I message Poh Ling
She help to breath nicely
And even she call Seng Tat to pick me up from CG
Then they decide to send me to Hospital (UM)
Everything was ok
Pulse rate was a bit high
The x-ray was ok
Everything was ok just hard to breath
Is so called hyperventilation
The cause is Stress and something trying to stop me
To fulfill my mission
This is what my mum told me
I guess so
Emily calls me and asks how check up
Then I call Joshua to tell him cos he is my leader
He didn’t know anything
Why u didn’t tell me
I know if like that they will also send me to hospital
But is ok.. Poh Ling will take care of it

Thanks to everyone who cares for me
My life in hostel and at home the same I just can’t stand it
Here and there got argument
They only think about themselves
Who think about me
Making problem only
Lead me to a conclusion of success
Nobody thinks about me..
Hope I’m not going for depression

Miracle

2009-08-11T19:12:00.000+08:00

Dear Father Lord,

Suddenly I just feel like writing out a poem

However, I really don’t know what to write

I feel sorry for my friend’s mother

The mother got this cancer of the colon

Then after that she have done the operation

It was success but only for three to four months

However, it have gone to 6 moths already

God have make miracle in her life

Hope that he is able to prepare himself

And on the 11 Aug 2009 at 6 something in the morning have pass away

I actually when my friend told me about septicemia

I already know it’s not long

I know the condition very well

This is about the Blood problem

However I just don’t know how to say

However my friend have the hope

What I think same as my mother

If the person so suffering

Why not God take the person to heaven

So that she have happy life there

She won’t be on earth so suffer with all the mesin

I know that God will take care of her

I love you Lord to take care of her

No matter how long I know her

Even I know her for few minutes

I still love her as my family

I just don’t know how to show her Love

I know God has a way

I believe in that

I pray that God will be able to take care her

Oh Lord pray that you will help my dear friend

To be ok soon

I want to see him happy like last time

Always make fun of me

Always there to help me in everything I need

No matter I know him for few months

He is my brother in Christ family to me

Heal him and build him up in everything

Thanks you Lord…

Sometimes I don’t understand

I know my parents worry about me

Therefore scare the children get sickness

Such as H1N1

Well, what I think that

Is true that we need to protect ourselves

However things that u wants to avoid

Sometimes the more u avoid the more will get

I believe that God will protect us

He will lead me the way

He know what should I do

He knows when I knew to leave

He knows when my job going to finish

I will going for mission

Sure there is a lot of sickness

I will be going through

This is really true

Now just let everything go through like that

Trust in the Lord

He will lead me through whatever what I need to go through

Thanks Lord for everything

Love you

Sensitive Issue

2009-08-09T17:51:00.000+08:00

Oh Father Lord

Today I am quite happy can meet back Chee Yee.

She is ok only that sometimes she just like to control people.

We have talk a lot of things today

After that, I feel bored also cos only both of us.

Suddenly there is a friend say about which Church is better.

I just don’t understand

Do not judge other people

We know ourselves, and we are not perfect at all.

God is the one who will Judge us when the end of the earth

In revelation God have mention in the Bible

Is ok he is still new believer

Must be patience ok…

What I think about that

Anywhere you feel comfortable then is good

Do not judge saying that this church feel more like Family

It is ourselves how you bring yourselves up in Christ

What you think and what you think about the Lord

You must know your God

Which one is the right one

There is only one God

Do not serve other God is enough already

This is a very sensitive issue

I just do not know how I should say already

He haven’t even join my church before

Forgive others and God will forgive us

Good things sya understand my feeling

Do not mention so much about religion

Oh God!!! Very upset to heard that

For my studies

Help me dear Lord to guide me in every way

Show that there is a different in me

I can do it Lord

Whatever it is I will just listen what you say

I want to listen to your words

Sure there is a lot of these things happen

Spiritual warfare ya… it is not easy lol

Whatever he don’t understand

Forgive him Lord.

Really hurt my feeling..

I don’t know why

Because this church have brought me up

I have learn quite a lot of things of there

Thanks you Lord for there to be with me

Lead me to more ways Lord

I want to continue my life as a missionary

I want to serve you..

Show me the way

Free from Exam

2009-08-03T09:28:00.000+08:00

Proverbs 29:25 – 26
It is dangerous to be concerned with what other think of you, but if you trust the Lord, you are safe.
Everybody wants the good will if the ruler, but only from the Lord can you get justice.

What I think this verse really speak to me.
It is true about that.
Think about this verse and is very meaningful to me

After exam was super free
Was sick whole week
What a week of sick
Hopefully can see Doctor today
What is life now
Lean me through the way in miracle
Guide each of my friends to goods of way
Finally I am able to write my blog
Such a long time didn’t write my blog
There are many things happen in my life
I really I dunno where to start

My hostel
Well, I trying my best to solve the problem
Whatever they want to do let it be
I’m just too tired to think and help them
It seen to make so much problem of it
My tears have been running out
Ever since I come in to this college
Every time I try to help them to solve and
They seen to make problem every time
How come they are not tired

There is one Christian
They way she act really not like Christian
Whatever I just don’t want care
She is like find me stupid
When there is something she wants
She will come to u
If not she don’t even care for you
She only think about her problem
So selfish
Human are seriously not perfect at all
But some how I just can’t stand it
No matter how many times I help her
She doesn’t care but only herself
What I know now.
God knows everything
God will help her in everything
Thanks Lord

I am truly very upset about that
But I always remember to forgive others
And God will forgive you rite
It is really true
Thanks god I still have some outside friends who care for me
Thanks Lord for those who care for me.
This is not end of the world yet

Now I am worried for my college
There are people in college got H1N1
Protect us Lord to go through all this.
I trust in you Lord
In everything you are there for me

Have a great day

Miracle way

2009-07-12T15:08:00.000+08:00

Quite a long time

Didn’t have the time to write my blog

I really miss my blog a lot

Recently preparing for exam

And I’m super tired for it

Exam is end of the month

I pray that God will be able to guide me through all this test

Very challenger but I believe that God have plans for me

This sem is a bit stressful

All I can do now is study and the rest leave everything to him

He will make a way for me

He love me so much and I love him very much

He is my everything

Without him I won’t be able to reach until here

Properly still hanging around in Columbia I guess

Thank you Lord

My dearest Hannah have left me to Australia

My best best friend or I should call her as my Godsister

She is my family and really close to each other

Everything we do together

However now she is away

She still there to encourage me

My dearest Sheena is back

Unable to see her yet

Cos she is going to have holiday with her family

Just hope to see her before she goes back to Australia

She always encourage me and with tears of Love

I just dunno how it happen but it really happen

Thank you Lord for making so much differents in my life

In a very special way I love you Lord

In times of life

I cannot understand

But God lead me through everything

I trust in him

He have given me miracle happen

In my family

Im so thankful and so happy

I just dunno how to explain it

Things happen and in different way

Thank you Lord

All happen and tears with love

The Love of God

Spiritual

2009-07-04T09:40:00.000+08:00

Oh Dear Father Lord
I was really very down that day
I am totally very useless that I feel
However, u have not given up on me
You have given me so much hope
U send people to build me up
I thank you Lord for everything
I realize that you are so amazing to me

That day I friend have a problem between her old religion
Therefore u have show her the way
Though that I have some problem between our friend
And yet I have forgive him
Now is the time there have to settle it themselves
I can only do things till here
Others I can only depend on you
I am so glad you are always there for me

Oh Lord, I remember that you have given me break through
For this week and so many times
I know that God u have show me that u really care for me
You have show me so much about life
You have teach me so much
I think is really miracle that you guide me through everything

Now Lord I have to depend on you on my exam
I am working hard on it
I have done my best and the rest I leave it to u Lord
I know that you will be there for me

Help me Lord
Give me the strength to go through all this
Without you what is life all about
But with you life so interesting in me
I wan to thank you Lord for everything

Sometimes I really dun understand the senior
They dun like to work with me
But ended up yesterday was the last day with them
One of them seen to enjoy working with me
Is ok that show that how God work through me
I am so thankful to u Lord.
I love you Lord so much
I have gain my challenger and I know there is more
Thank you Lord
Amen

Good News

2009-06-14T09:35:00.000+08:00

Oh father Lord, thank you so much for letting me share to my fren
I know that I am not the one to bring her to Christ
However u are the one who lead me to
I am glad she is able to accept u as Lord and savior
Oh Lord lead her to a new life
Change everything to be better for her
I know there will be challenger coming to her
Lord to show her the way and guide her in everyway
Take care of her Lord

She haven’t tell her parents about it
Continue to guide with the right time for her to speak
In a miracle way to bring her family to Christ
It is totally not the easy way
I am willing to do my best to help her
Dear Lord lead me and her to do what we should do

Dear Lord, help my dear fren mun kin to understand what is Jesus all about
I believe one day he is able to accept u as Lord and savior
Lead him and help him to understand u more Lord
Even he have gone to church for two years
Continue to show him more
Thank you Lord for everything
Things become more and more better in Christian walk
I have faith in You Lord

Father please forgive my sin
I am a sinner
Even I am a Christian a long time
I am so not sure where I am going to be
Therefore I want to commit myself to you
Help me to do what I should do
Especially when I was in hostel
Lead me to show how a Christian should be
Control my temper Lord
I know sometimes people cannot be trusted so much
But Lord please lead me to let them believe in me
Let them ask me more about Jesus Lord
It seen some of them got some problem but I dunno how should start
Thanks You Lord

Even sometimes I am a bit stressful
Lord please help me calm down
Show in a beautiful to lead me through this course
Sometimes I just dunno what to do
I believe and have faith that I have to finish this course
Lord I am sure you know why
Because of u Lord
I am doing this studies for u
To be a ble to lead myself to be a missionary
I guess now is the time for me to bring myself up
I know that God really love each one of us in a different way
Thank you Lord for everything

BDAY 2009

2009-05-30T14:31:00.009+08:00

Finally I am back to my house in puchong. I am having great time in training and my birthday on the 21 May at the age of 22 years old. I feel so old wei..

Anyway, I just to make myself clear about this year for my birthday wish.

Some people say we should not say it out until it works.

I don’t mind about it. This is to make myself clear.

I must change my attitude to be a better person.

I want to be a good student in college

I want to be the best in college.

To show the people who look down on me.

Thank you father lord to be there to listen to me always.

Problem is always there and we have to solve it with a professional way.

As a good nurse..

When I tell my friend about that and he say wah esthery have grown up already.

I was like oh not all the while like that meh. Maybe I think

Any way there is some photo to share

Posting

2009-05-30T14:28:00.000+08:00

My first week of posting in PKKN is mostly for patient who have leprosy, tuberculosis and also HIV. I was in charge to take care of patient who has leprosy which is already negative which not spread already. The patient there are some which don’t have legs and hands, some even got psychology problem like mental. Really all kinds of things we see in the place. Some of them, which don’t have legs and hands, they even help each other to wash their plates, bowls and cups. They are really nice and helping each other and also they do fight and scold patient not nurse because some of them really a bit of problem like psychology.

In this place, I learn something is a reminder to me. They have no legs and hand and yet still they can live their life for so many years already more then 50 to 60 years. Some of them help to cook dishes when they feel like to cook. They really felt like home. I learn that sometimes we have problem to us like a big problem but we couldn’t help it like we so tension with it. However, imagine for these patients who have no hands and legs because of nerve did not flow well and cause damage already. To what I think is that their problem is bigger then us because is their whole life. Ours was only can settle or leave it just as is. I am seriously very proud of them. Is great that we know there are people who are like and yet they can take care of themselves. Now generation have change is different then before.

My second week on the 1st week of posting. Oh lord, today is not my day. I am supposed to work at afternoon but suddenly early in the morning, the people message me at 7:30am expect me to go now. Four of us, have to call here and there to know which ward, which CI, which place really make my day. I really don’t understand why they have to give information last minute on the doe.go late and come back early, there are nice senior that we join. Thanks Lord for everything no matter I still love you muax..

Worship

2009-05-17T14:35:00.003+08:00

Oh dear Lord
What will happen to me when posting
I wan everything to go through perfectly
In a miracle way
I always believe in the Lord
Nurses day will be celebrate on the 20th May
So sad Saturday got posting
Wan everything to be great for next week

Worship

Worship is an emotional response
Directed toward God
Involving the whole body
Environment
Because of his holiness and his grace

Who do you worship?
How do you worship?
Where do you worship?
Do you worship God other then cg or church?
To let u think about it

Thank you Lord

Early Celebration Birthday

2009-05-09T22:02:00.004+08:00

This is our day off for early celebration birthday
Is our wonderful day
We really enjoy ourselves
At last we brought quite a lot of things hehe
Life is worship
Worship is very important
It is deep in our heart to worship the Lord for true heart
True worship
Great worship deep in our heart

Puppy

2009-05-09T21:51:00.006+08:00

The little puppy I my grandma house so cute like baby

Dad’s birthday cake

On day out

2009-05-09T21:41:00.005+08:00

On a Sunday that suddenly
We plan to go out for shopping
Not real shopping but window shopping
Haha..end up did not buy anything hehe cool huh

We told photo in IOI mall wow

This is Melissa Choo and her brother and also me

We went out together

How beautiful my mum is

2009-05-07T20:48:00.000+08:00

To a lovely mother in my life
Described my mum
She is a wonderful mum in my life
She is the most beautiful person in this world

No matter how things goes wrong
She is still able to hang in there
This is because god is with her
She believe God can make miracle happen

Sometime I am so impress by her
I wonder can be like my mum
She is a very understanding person
She is able to control her temper

In my life, I haven’t seen a person
Which is almost as perfect as she is
This is because God work through her
God have shown her so amazingly

We want to say sorry to our mother
Due to sometimes we in wrong
Sometimes we didn’t respect and angry with her
We want to take this opportunity to say SORRY

We also want to take this opportunity say THANK YOU
For the things she have done for us
Because of both us, she have suffer so much
She have made our life so wonderful

We love you so much
Sometimes we don’t really show
However in our heart
You are wonderful and beautiful like an ANGEL

Why like that? Sad!!!

2009-05-05T21:51:00.000+08:00

Oh Lord I wonder how long I can stand this friend
I try my very best to be a good friend
He just like to argue with people
My friend also feel the same
I’m so tired to entertain him already
He like to make his own choice for people
I hope Lord please guide me to be more patient
I dun no what else can I do
He only wanna follow up this and that
I know he love God so much but also got timing
To him Jesus is coming
Yes , I know but when people cannot accept
We cannot force people
We only can try our best and God will do the rest
Why can’t he just understand this point
I just don’t know what is gone into him
He think is easy to get a non-christian to Christian
For me, it is also not easy to ask them to go
There is always the timing to do things
I am going to be Crazy but his attitude
Oh Lord, what should I do
No matter what I tell him to be patient need to wait
And yet he say no no no..
Jesus is coming, he told me
Yes, but cannot force people ok ok ok..
How to tell him
Nothing is easy unless God made it to be

I wanna cry Lord
I have my own problem
My studies and my result not in good shaped
However this guy keep disturbing me
I think I am going into depression soon
I don’t want things to be happen like Tung Shin
I don’t want Lord
This far I have gone through
Please do lead me to the end Lord
I try my best to have happy day
And yet it seen cannot be help
I can only depend on u Lord

Happy Birthday Angeline..
Have a great day..

Thank you Lord for everything muaxx

My problem

2009-05-04T20:45:00.000+08:00

Today, I finally spend sometime to do some notes for two subject
There is a guy ask me to be his girlfriend and he is waiting for the answer
However, we know each other for maybe hmm since form 1 till now
He is younger then one year but I really dun have the feeling for it
How am I suppose to tell him the answer
Every time, we meet also we argue one
Even Yesterday also he call me and also we argue
He ask me out to watch movie with him alone
How can? To me I cannot do it. I am scare
I dun wan to give him hope
I am really just think he is just a friend to me
It is very difficult for to tell him
Oh dear Lord, I pray that soon my prince will come to me
I wan the prince which I can love him and also he love me
For now, I dun wan to think about relationship between girl and boy
I wan my future to be success first
Even I dun have also I am ok with it. Ya I am desperate but let it be my dream
I wan to fulfill my future and be a missionary
Others let God think for me
I wan some one to come with me to the missionary field (nurse and doctor)
In my mind, I dun wan doctor to be my future dream
Because due to some thing that I have seen which I think dun need to be
What is in my mind now?
Why when I tell people about my problem can’t they just understand me?
Oh Lord for me is very difficult to find a person to listen to my problem.
I also dunno why I got some much problem
In this world, there are things happen just like that
There is always a reason as I told myself to remember
I just have to depend On God

Thanks Lord

In Cova

2009-05-02T11:07:00.010+08:00

The lake behind my hostel

My best friend Hannah and me

My hostel swimming pool which is Cova

My hostel housemate

Me

Yana and me

Yana and me

Happy Labour Day

2009-05-01T15:15:00.002+08:00

Happy Labour Day
Is the day of everybody having holiday
There is where the family get together
Spend the time together

Father, I want to have a friend which is not a christian
Yesterday my friend and I bring her to CG at New life Church
I really hope that one day she will be able to accept what is Jesus all about
Is great to join them for CG I found that is a bit different
However I would is really comfortable with that
Pray that gives her the confident to accept Jesus as saviour
In Jesus Name Amen

Exam Mid Term

2009-04-26T09:17:00.000+08:00

Father, I really have no idea for this semester 2.
I am afraid but now I have trust in the Lord
All I have to do is do my best in everything
God will do the rest as always
God have mention it many times
I have to keep repeating to myself as a reminder
Help me lord.
I will always remember this verse
John 14:1
Do not let ur heart be in trouble
Trust in the lord and also believe in Jesus..
Thanks Lord..

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO JOAN
Really missing her so much
Enjoy working with her hehe..
Muaxx..

Thank you Lord
I love you
Take care

Thank you Lord

2009-04-12T17:20:00.004+08:00

Finally my result is out. I am so happy
I want to thank for those who help me
Especially God, because he keep letting me believe in him
I did not know that I did not bad.. I love you Lord
This verse keep reminder me about it
John 14:1
Do not let trouble in your heart,
Trust in the Lord and also believe in me.

Now the most important thing I have to start preparing for Sem 2 mid term
The lecturer got high expectation on me
So pressure, tension, stress
Working on it to make myself more confident
There is one friend saying that I am giving the person excuse
The person just don’t understand
It takes me for few months to get back confident
And going on the right track
The person was saying everyday say busy why now still can online
Mostly I will online and also doing my assignment and home work and studies together
Don’t judge people on the outside but look the inside before you say anything
Dunno how many times I have repeat what I say
My schedule is very pack
Mon till Friday is 9 am till 5pm for classes reach hostel already 6am
Normally I will wash my clothes 1^st then rest sometimes cook for the housemate to eat
By the time everything settle is already 8pm or 9pm
Not only one subject I have to study is four subjects this semester
All this subject need to memorize one not as the 1^st semester
Really scare to drop the marks
I don’t even have the time for myself
Why can’t the person understand me
So angry say I giving excuse.
Thank you Lord for everything you have done for me
I will continue to do what I should do
And always remember that what is my dream
muaxx

Thank you

2009-03-19T20:05:00.001+08:00

I just wan to say thank you
You have made my life meaningful
You always made my day such as wonderful as it was
You have done so much in my life

No matter what I always depend on you without fail
You have show me the way
You are always there
You are the one who encourage me

I just can’t believe it
However you have show me the way
You make miracle
You have make things real to me

When I feel down
You are there to show me
A cheerful world you have shown me
You make my life unforgettable

When I loss hope
You have shown me hope
You make a way for me
You still have confident in me

When I feel sad
You are there to be my father
You are forever mine
You are beside me to listen to my tear

I wonder that am I important to you
To him, everybody is special
He created me and everyone else
There is specialty in my life

When I have problem
He makes a way for me
He asked me to trust in him
I do my best and he do the rest

When I feel happy
I am glad to share it with him
I want to share with everyone else through my testimony
I want share and let people know that my life is different

I know he cares for me
He knows what is best for me
He wants me to be a different person
He is everything to me

He is so grateful
He so understands
He is so wonderful
He is so lovely

When I asked for help
You are there
You are willing to listen
You answered

I just want to say thank you
I just don’t know what else can I do
I just want to be your best daughter
I just want to be pure as you are

I love you Lord

2009-03-19T20:04:00.000+08:00

I love you Lord,
I am to love you
To worship u with all my heart

Thanks you Lord.
U are always there to make my day
U lean me through in a miracle way
U always there when I have trouble
U r everything to me
I put my trust in u always

Thank you
For always being there with me
Whatever I done, you are still there to comfort me
You still forgive me
I am so glad that you are my Lord

Sometimes, I wonder why
He is so wonderful
He is very understanding
He is so great then anything in my life
Sometimes I just don’t understand
However, he is the one who make situation for me to understand

holiday

2009-03-19T20:03:00.000+08:00

Oh this week holiday, I felt that I am very relieved from the exam. I don’t feel so stress anymore. I always trust in the Lord. I believe he will make way for me whatever it is. I feel that whatever I am going through, he is there to encourage me but sometimes is myself that don’t have confident. I am so blessed by the Lord. The only thing I can do is to fulfill the dream I always wanted to be.

In my life
I always wonder why
All things happen to me

There is always a problem for me
There is always something for me to solve
There is always life with difficulty
There is always a person for me to think
There is always glory
There is always faith in me
There is always someone help me out in everything
There is Holy Spirit in me
It is you Lord

I wonder when will be my time
I just to be myself one day
I want to do something for him
How I am going to do it

Semester 1

2009-03-19T19:33:00.001+08:00

Before my final exam sem 1
My final exam during the week

My Colleagues

Special me

My friend

Me and Charen (she is my only Christian Friend in College and also Housemate)

Me and Leela

My Colleagues

This is Group D (3/2008B)
During Practical for the last day

In this semester 1, I have learned a lot even though I have study before assistance nurse. I always tell myself that I don’t want same things happen as before. I have told my leader and he told normally it would not happen again. I choose to trust him before I believe that God would not want me to have the same thing happen because he wants me to do what is best.

I have met a lot of people in hospital and I know that I can make a different. In hospital, I feel so use to it like my second home. I am able to encourage patient and they are so friendly. Sometimes, I feel that they are just like my family. In this world, everyone is the same just that how are you going to control your attitude. To me, patients are just like my family. I am willing to listen to their needs. Whoever wants to have a talk with me, I am willing to listen. I can give opinion when they need it.

In hospital, I meet a lot of my friends where last time they are in my old place. I am so glad that we are able to meet again. In this world is so small. I feel that is good to meet my old friend. As long as I know what is my part.

My housemate, there is good and bad. Whatever happen try to solve it or leave it to the Lord. We are like sister, we must help each other whatever it is. Sometimes, I just don’t understands why there are things happen to make everything feel so out of control.

The most important thing in my life, which will be my future, my studies and my life. Other things, I am too tired to know about it.

The lecturer in this college was better then before the college that I went. I don’t think is suitable to tell because this is my privacy. Sometimes, people wants to say bad about us. It is no good to tell others about the other college. People might want to make your life miserable but we don’t do bad to them. I always tell myself whatever people do something’s bad to you is okay because for those who do bad things will happen worst for them. There is the different. My lecturer thinking is very positively. They always encourage me and I really need this encouragement. This really help me a lot during my exam time. Thank you to everyone who help me.

Final Sem 1

2009-03-09T17:39:00.001+08:00

Exam tomolo.. ah…ah…ah.. ah.. help me
Oh Lord, tomolo is the exam for Anantomy And Physiology
I have read but still there are things that I forget
Please able to help me to remember
I wan miracle to work in me..
Trust in the Lord as I always do
Wednesday will be nursing science
Should be better then previous exam because I have confident
Help me Lord to write out with a wonderful way
Thursday will be OSCE = O Skill Clinical Examination
Which what I normal do the procedure in ward.
Help me Lord that I will be able to do
I don’t want to get nervous be with me Lord.
I just have to be confident and have faith
Trust the Lord he can do anything

Thank you Lord.

World Unfair

2009-03-06T22:14:00.000+08:00

There are some people thinks that I am happy in my college by the photo. What I want to say is don’t judge by the outside but look clearly inside or understand the heart. I just don’t understand some people judge it by photo. For a logic things that everybody wants to look better and nice in the photo what do u say? Does u agree with me? If u does please leave ur comment on my blog.

Oh Lord, I know that no body is perfect in this world for those who are old enough please think a bit mature. I have some problem with my housemate which one of them. After that day, I just don’t want to care about anything at all except my studies or those are related to it. No matter, how much I try to make things work out but they just bother what it is all about. Attitude is very important to nursing course. I have the same problem but I try my best to change my attitude to the best but some people only think about themselves. This world doesn’t have love or family or even friends who can understand and try to work out for things better. I am just too tired to bother them anymore. I know what is rite I will do. I really don’t want to know what they think or do. Not easy to do anything in this world however we need to try our best to change whatever we need too.

There is a guy that I get to know him in sg buloh hospital. At first, he offer me to work in Australia after three years but after about two weeks. He call me and tell me that the hospital is ready in Australia. He wants me to go over there to study my nursing. He said don’t worry about the cost because the hospital will sponsor me as in full scholarship but of course have to work for them about few years. I am afraid that is this true and I ask opinion all my friends said is a good opportunity. Not easy to get offer from overseas for full scholarship. They ask me to check and I have check in the internet and everything is true and real. Lord, I leave it to you because I am afraid to choose the wrong way as before. What is my life for always stop here and there. I just have to count on God and believe in him to let him tell me what I am supposed to do for this. I tell myself, I am willing to go if only is God wants me to go if not I will just continue here in Malaysia.

I am so stressful now. I have exam coming which is final sem 1 exam. Lord, lead me through everything. Give me wisdom, knowledge, memory to be able to write or do well in my exam. I have to study and let God work in me. I believe in him. thank you Lord for everything. You are the best and I trust in YOU.

Show me the rite way to be.

Finally

2009-02-22T10:30:00.004+08:00

My cg member in Christ or my family

Thank you Lord that I finally finish my assignment for sociology. This really takes me weeks to finish and so many words to write. Thank you to those who help me out especially my mum, my leader (Joshua), my aunty (Mag), my lecture(Miss Hasanah) and also my dear friends.

I did not write my blog a long time due to my assignment, training in hospital and also preparing for exam year 1 sem 1. this is the most important exam I must do well. Oh Lord, I want to do my best for this. Help me through with every need and I will also do my best to study. Help me to remember everything that I have read and also help me to understand it.

Lord, I met a guy which is can be my father. Anyway, he asked me to go Australia to work after three years. I just leave everything to you to decide whether should I go or send any other place that you have plan for me. He have chooses me to work at his hospital which he said he is the chairman.

Lately, I am very tension and stressful for so many things such as my studies, my cross book, oski exam and final exam sem 1. lead me through. I want to go to the mountain and have a shout. So many problem that I am facing, can I just do my best in exam. I really do not want to think of other things at all.

Lead me in a miracle way
I trust in you Lord
I know u r always there to help me in everyway that I need
I want to have peaceful life
Believe in the Lord
That is the only way I can do
Sorry for everything that I done
Please forgive me

How my Training Life goes

2009-01-24T09:50:00.000+08:00

Sungai Buloh Hospital

Yus and Me in Sungai Buloh Hospital.

Our Patient in Sg Buloh

Our Patient in Sg Buloh and group E

Nurul, Esther (me), Wan Norshida, Umira, Wan Mohd, Patient, Charen, Suzie, Vinod

We take photo before we leave for holiday and our last day in this ward.

Flower on patient table

Charen N Esther (Me)

Me in the Bus

Me and my CI (Miss Wansuhanawati)

I’m in Columbia Asia Shah Alam.
Is a nursing home there.

Oh.. This photo is take when I went for dinner (Mum’s office 10th Anniversary)

Wow, still got only one more day to go is Happy Chinese New Year.
Time pass by so fast. Didn’t realize it.
I was in sungai buloh hospital for two days training. Is a government hospital.
The place is very super big and nice.
I though only Columbia Asia Puchong use laptop for passing report even this government hospital also use laptop.
Wow, in this hospital for student, we can do anything.
I also get to interview the patient.
We get to know how the sickness becomes worst and why they are in hospital.
There is one patient came from puchong also. He is staying in Wawasan.
Which is behind Columbia Asia Puchong. He came in because of vocal cord.
This time, he come in for 4th time operation.

Oh Dear Lord
Thanks you for everything
That u have given me so much
U helps me through for every problem that I face

Therapeutic Fighter

2009-01-18T11:59:00.000+08:00

This photo is before we present our role play or as in drama.
This is my college practical room

This is my friend Wan , my friends call us twins haha..for fun

WOW, is already 2009. I cannot believe it. I want a great year.
Happy New year..
This week is not a good week.
My hostel got no water because the college didn’t pay the water bill.
Everyday seen like got something happen.
Some more, my assignment for role play have to finish by four days.
However, we did quite well for the role play.
This is my group therapeutic fighter.
I am the leader of this group.
This is my group member.

Christmas

2008-12-26T14:21:00.000+08:00

Me and my cg leader (Josh)
Jack.. he came back from Australia..

My cg members
(Rachel Ding, Melissa Leong, me, Charis & Rachel Yap)

Post everybody

CG family photo

CG family photo ( pot bless)

Thinking about what we want for Christmas

What is Christmas all bout
Not about present
Not about Santa Claus
Is all bout Jesus

He is born on Christmas Day
He is very important to us
He die on the cross for us
Our sin

As years has come
Everyone though Christmas is bout Santa Claus or present
People always get the wrong information

I pray that people will understand more
Have Christian share to them about Christ
Christ is here

This Christmas I really enjoy myself
I have great family, friends, pccg, best friend
I wan for Christmas not about having a BMW or expensive stuff
I just wan a different in me,
Non-christian to become 1
That’s all

Thanks Lord for giving me a wonderful Christmas
Is better then last year
Last year was rushing here and there
For training
Not easy to become a nurse
Be a nurse have to sacrifice ur time

Be a good nurse

2008-11-29T15:25:00.000+08:00

Be a good nurse
Is not easy to be a good nurse
Must have the patience, caring, responsible…..
There are steps to learn more

Firstly is our attitude
Change our attitude to be the best
Before we touch patient’s life
By each day we learn to change

When we see patient 1st thing is to smile
Before we do anything
Patient will feel comfortable
When we treat them as our friend

Our communication is very important
Always remember to listen to their needs
As nurses, try to help them or even solve their problem
Care for them as our family

When we need to do procedures
Explain everything to patient
Before we do anything
Let them know what the nurses are going to do

When we have some free time
We can have sometime for them
So that we can give health education (how to take care of themselves)
They will know that nurses do care about them

When patients feeling sad or on desperation
Nurses have to observe more
Take more attention on them
Understand their condition

Nurses is also like a counselor
Must be a good listener
So that we know how have they gone through their life
Nurses also can give advice on that

Nurses also can ask about how’s today?
Izzit better then yesterday
We know that each day they are getting better
Nurses and doctor also will be happy that patient getting well by each day

A Life Of Cindy

2008-10-30T11:08:00.000+08:00

All of sudden, Cindy ask me to write a poem because I’m free. My lecture didn’t come again. How am I going to take my exam? God please help me. I’m trusting on you and depend on you.

In a word that needs to be expression on you
That will be your life full of Confidence
I can see some specialty in you
It is very hard to speak out from my mouth

From my experience
You are a very strong Christian
You are a very close to God
You are able to hear Gods voice

Whenever I talk to you
I’m full with confidence
Maybe I would say
Full of life and able to communicate

I would to say that
You are a person who accept anyone
You are a person who good listener
Continue to be a person who God wants

Time flies just like that
We are here for a purpose
Therefore to speak Gospel to others
No matter what religion are they

In this earth,
Not everything is easy
We must know how to get over it
Life is not just like that

We have full of things to do
Find out what is a greatest thing in you
Share it to those who need it
Everyone have a spiritual gift
Have you find it yet

I have a spiritual gift
Which is not everybody has it
A good listener, caring person
Maybe I would I am a very understanding person
Would you agree with that?
This is what I have found in me

An encouragement for u
Continue to seek God
Continue to love him and pray
He is the best God that I ever have in my life

Thanks father Lord. I know you are always there for me.
Lean me through whatever it is.

Happy Birthday to Samuel, Stephen, Dasoh and Melissa Yeoh for this week
All the best in everything you guys do.
God bless you.

Happy Deepavali

2008-10-27T09:32:00.001+08:00

Just want to Wish those who celebrating Deepavali
Happy Deepavali
Enjoy your day ya

That day, I got a friend ask me about Christ. She is a malay. Is great that, I am able to speak in Malay to tell them about Christ. Oh Lord, this is the purpose I am here. I know that God is always with me. I’m not afraid to speak about Christ. I know that the Lord will lean me through and speak through my mouth by his words. I am proud of myself. Now, I learning a lot to have more confidence in myself. All this things, I can do why not studying. Thanks Lord that you are always there for me. Lord continues to work in me.

The pinky

So formal like working hehe

In English Class, she is my housemate and my partner।

The Ladies

The nurses

Like still sleeping. In Auditorm B like UNI class. It is Uni

Is Friday can’t wait to go back

Boring

2008-10-22T11:45:00.000+08:00

What should I do? My English teacher didn’t come. Few times already she didn’t come. What happen to her? I’m wasting my time in computer lab now.

Just now, my friend who studies in Tung Shin invited me to go for graduation on the 7 December. I didn’t finish the course. Now no matter what I must finish it. Is my dream and God’s task is given to me.

Nothing is easy in the world
Work hard
Work smart
This earth is different from the old generation

Life is not as simple as it is
We have our specialty
Use it wisely
Everything is in our hand

What should I do?
I’m worried
Whether to go a not
What are they going to say about me?

How can I keep the secret in me?
What they going to think about me?
I don’t care what they think about me
Just dunno what else they will say

Is either good or bad?
I need to accept it
Life is like politic
Stick with it

I know my dreams
I need to be success soon
Who cares what people say
Do what is right

Do what is suppose to do
Be a successful person
Show it to them
They are wrong

Lean me thought Lord
I have to count on u
Do my best
Why others can why I cannot
Believe that everything is possible
In this earth
Have faith in the Lord
Trust him

This is just to encourage myself. I have to think positively

This is how my college started this year for diploma

2008-10-18T18:47:00.000+08:00

Today, I went to sunway pyramid with my good friend.
Christie from Tung Shin hospital (Assistant Nurse)
This is our first time go out to sunway by car
Such a long we didn’t go out
So happy that we went out

My housemate ( ros, me and eva)
The art department and different post

Charen, me, ros, nurul and azi

ros, me and eva

My housemate

A post which looking up
What izzit?
Only wall on top
Special post I think

Smile gurl

What is that gurl?
Wearing baju kurung
Look special
Purple looks nice

This is ros
We are in the same class for English
We also same group
Is amazing
Good partner I think

First week in Segi university college

2008-10-18T17:24:00.000+08:00

Thanks Lord, I have started my nursing course. These 4 weeks I start with English class to improve my English. I will be staying in the hostel. The hostel is very far from Puchong. It will take more then 1 hour and the half to reach my hostel. my college is at Kota Damansara. What I can say? The hostel is better then the previous one. I don’t want to complain about it. I will try my best to get use to it. My dream is to be a missionary. So when a missionary go to overseas that will be worst then this training that I want. I must do my best no matter what I have to continue. This point will be my beginning.

That is something I need to share. When we are on earth, we have something important to our life. Our life wouldn’t be easy because we have a purpose to be here. What is the purpose in life? Some might not know, God made each of us to be in the earth with a purpose as share Christ to the non-Christian. Everybody will have a difficult time. However, when Jesus comes back to earth everything will be different. We will have a good life. When times come, we will be in heaven and is a wonderful place. We will suffer because there is a purpose for me to be here.

Lord, this time I will do my best because of what task you have giving me। I want to finish that task. I want my life to be interesting. No matter what happen, I must be able to finish this task. I know nothing is easy in this earth. As some people say there is nothing free in this earth.

Today, I went out with my friend. She is a Assistant Nurse. She studies with me in Tung Shin hospital. I am very happy to go out with her. Father Lord, just want to have a short prayer. I’m hoping that she will be able to transfer to Columbia Asia to work. No matter what don’t let her feel that whatever she does is nothing can be done better. She just broke up with her boyfriend. Help her to control her feeling because the guy really hurt her very deeply and broke her heart. That guy has another girl by massaging a lover massage. Help her to let go. Show how great is a God to her. Without God is different in life but without guy nothing is cannot be done. Show her a miracle and able to accept Christ. In Jesus name Amen.

Go out with friends

2008-10-12T20:45:00.000+08:00

This is Jia Chuen and me
Wow..we know each other for such a long time
Since I’m form one till now
We are really like brother and sister
Izzit that great
Brother and sister in Christ
We talk to mun kin about Christ that day
Hope it will work cos it lean through christ

This is Poh Ling
My schoolmate and college room mate
We are sisters
She is a vegetarian
We both know each other very well
She encourage me to finish this course this time
Love u so much.. thanks
Father Lord, hope some day she will accept Christ
We have been stay in one year and the half already

That day, I went out with my secondary school friend.
I seldom go out with them
However I am having a great time
We have talked a lot
All of us grow up
There is a differents
Izzit it great that people change
Thank God for given me a change to meet my old friend
That will be mun kin and poh ling..
Poh ling is my school mate and college friend hehe

We were at kopitiam in PJ On the 9 October 2008

50th anniversary

2008-09-28T15:55:00.000+08:00

Yesterday was an awesome night. My grandparent’s 50th anniversary wedding and al the grandchildren match in together. So grand man…

Is a very special occasion
Thanks Lord

Happy Birthday jie jie

2008-09-25T19:48:00.000+08:00

Happy Birthday jie jie (Zhe Zhen) hope everything going fine with you
Hope that life going much and much better
Dreams will come true if u work hard
Life so many challenge to go on
Lord, is wonderful that I have a sister like her
Even we do argue sometimes
I know that u love me as much as a younger sister
I’m so glad to have u in my life
Thanks Lord
Please forgive me when I’m rude to you
Sometimes, I just can’t control it
Sorry, however I love you ya…
Muaxx…
Hugs

thinking

2008-09-25T19:47:00.000+08:00

All of sudden, I was thinking about that day what (the hospital head of the ward) Sister Ong told me. She says that when got something that I feel uncomfortable can complain to her. To me, no matter how much I want to say but still I feel that is not important. If I complain but they think they can improve. I don’t think so. Therefore, there are people complain before and yet improve only for few days and go back to the same again. Well, yes I will only complain to my friends but I don’t like to complain to the head. What for, to me is no point for complaining to the head. She says be a person must know how to say it out. Is ok that whatever happens no body knows is fine for me as long God knows what I am going through. I know that everybody is not perfect. I’m just too tired to say anything. I just want to live my life through. I don’t want any argument with anyone. If they don’t understand me is ok to me. I have no problem at all. All I can do is keep it inside and write it out to release it that is enough for me.
Sometimes, even I tell people. They will just say no you are wrong. Things should not be done like that. Yes, they are older then me. So what, sometimes the younger one can even know what things are the best. Sometimes, they say if u got anything that I don’t know I can ask. Even I ask just a little bit things also get scolding. Sometimes do you think that I better don’t ask and just do what is right. Or I can ask those all willing to help

grandparent’s 50th anniversary wedding

2008-09-25T19:45:00.000+08:00

I can’t wait for my grandparent’s 50th anniversary wedding is on Saturday.
Is amazing that they have been together for so many years
I just want to give them a poem made by me

My grandparents
Since young I have been be with them
Incredible that they have been together for so long
There are times they argue
They still get together and love each other a lot
Doing crazy things together

My grandfather
He is a person who always talks a lot
Talk’s bout last time how things go
I can even repeat what he say
He do care about me very much
I know it very well
Because I’m the grandchildren
Can say I and my sister are the older one
I’m glad to have him in my life

My grandmother
She is a person who always wants to stop my grandfather
For going some where
She is a wonderful grandmother that I ever met
I’m so encourage by her
She always ask me to pray before doing anything
Great to have her in my life
She loves me so much
She even buys things for me

There is once my grandfather ask my grandmother that do she love him
I feel so touched by it
There are so wonderful
My grandmother says yes I do love but it doesn’t show
Therefore, is inside my heart
I have never seen so lovely couple they are
Now a days not many couple is so lovely
So happy for them

There is a song, I really want them to listen is very meaning because the words say that God made us and thinking about us.

When God made you by newsong and Natalie grant
Its always been a mystery to me,How two hearts can come together,And love can last forever.But now that I have found you I believe,That a miracle has come when God sends the perfect one.So gone are all my questions about why,And i've never been so sure of anything in my lifeOh I wonder what God was thinking,when he created you.I wonder if He knew everything I would need,Because he made all my dreams come true.When God made you, He must have been thinking about me.Ooo ooo,I promise that wherever you may go, wherever life may lead you,With all my heart I'll be there too.And from this moment on I want you to know,I'll let nothing come between us, and I will love the ones you love.So gone are all my questions about why
And I’ve never been so sure of anything in my lifeOh I wonder what God was thinking when he created you,I wonder if He knew everythin I would need,Because He made all my dreams come true.When God made you He must've been thinking about me.He made the sun He made the moon,To harmonize a perfect tune,One can't do without the other they just have to be together.And that is how I know it's true,Your for me and i'm for you and my worldJust can't be right without you in my lifeOh I wonder what God was thinking,when he created you.I wonder if He knew everything I would need,Because he made all my dreams come true.When God made you, He must have been thinking about me.He must have heard every prayer I've been praying. He must've knew everything I would needWhen God made you, He must've been thinking about me.

Worried College & hospital

2008-09-25T19:43:00.000+08:00

OH Lord!! My course is starting early at 13 October not 2nd November anymore. What is the feeling now? Now I’m worried that I couldn’t get my leave for the course starting. The sister says without me the ward will collapse. However, I’m leaving so soon. What can I do now? Help me Lord hoping that everything will be fine for me tomorrow. I also miss Columbia a bit and the patients that I have help. I really enjoy sometimes but when problem comes just a bit of tired to listen.

Yesterday, we have meeting at Columbia Asia with the GM (General Manager). She can tell about her experience. I can see that she is a very good nurse and friendly person. Her words really inspire me and very meaning to me. The word she has says really happen in my life before.
Life with so many challenges
Encourage me a lot
She says nurses are the 1st to attend patients
Everything patients will come 1st to nurses
I wish to know her background more
It is really interesting
I’m sure she must be a very good GM

Holy Spirit

2008-09-13T13:00:00.000+08:00

Well, yesterday I went for cell group for the Christian Apologetics. Some body asks me a question. Do you think Holy Spirit can just come like that or can u reject it? For my personal experience is I cannot stop because I know what is my role. Yes is true that u can reject it but for me. The camp that I went the Holy Spirit speak through me and I start crying out and I can’t stop it so that’s I went front for prayer. Is amazing God is. He knows what I need that’s why for me I will let the Holy Spirit to work through me that’s why I am on earth. I was born here to do something.

What is life man?

2008-09-10T20:36:00.000+08:00

Today is a very busy day for me
I have done observation for almost the whole ward
Congrats dear is amazing
Help also get scolding by CI
I have already inform the SN
Why can’t she understand
Even Azizah also say what lah we keep in when we take
Really no cooperation at all
How do I know that I have to inform u
U didn’t tell me anything.
What a tired day
Hmm.. my wrong?? No idea..
Hey nobody is perfect mah in this world
I am out of my mine liao

Psalm 139

2008-09-05T23:31:00.000+08:00

Psalm 139
This is my verse for today it speaks through me. Thanks Lord.
This few days a lot of thing happen to me. After came back from s happen always there is a purpose but what is the purpose? I don’t get it.

My head (sister) in the hospital. She says I don’t complain unless she asks me. So far, I don’t complain to her because I have learn that if I complain it means that you don’t like God’s plan or even blame God. I can feel it always there is a reason. I just can’t do it to complain. She ask me to let it out but I can’t this is my attitude. Something, I really do complain but to my friends or family only.

I just want to let it out here. I don’t think I will complain unless I have to do it. These people even new staff nurse also a bit of lazy not a Muslim also like that. I’m really not in the mood. Some more on medication because I got sore throat, flu and so on. Although, I have to do observation and I done all. Therefore, I still have to do collect tray food. I also help Mollie side to put up drip, give hot water. They didn’t appreciate some more ask people to answer call bell. They themselves so free and sitting down on the counter. Can’t they just move and walk around. I think I am considering very good already today. I just can’t stand it almost want to say something but yet I keep it to myself.

Lord, what should I do? Should I tell Sister Ong? No use telling Sister Penny, she only cares about herself and she don’t bother. All she says is write letter or something like that. I want to release it Lord. I dunno what else can I do? All I can do is depend on u. I feel very tired and a bit of angry. Lazy to say already. Just want to cry out to u Lord.

Father Lord, pls help me to control my temper, I really don’t care what are they going to think about me. I have to do my job until done. As long I have done my job. I have done my best. Other people, they don’t know Never mind. Because I know that God’s understand me. He understand what I am going through. Lead me the way Lord. Help me Lord to be different from others. I want to be a better person. Sorry Lord, pls forgive me if I have done wrong. I know I’m a sinful person but forgiven people can go heaven. Thanks Lord, in Jesus name Amen.

Lord Lead me the way, I know is unfair in this earth. I’m tired of it already. hope someone understand me but I know God understand.ya. I want to release.

Just started work the feeling

2008-09-02T22:43:00.000+08:00

Today started work after 5 days off. I am so not use to it. I still want holiday. The people which was the??? because of Puasa so not in the good mood. you know !!! nevermind forgive them. I want to leave the place faster. One of the Tung Shin came and work also.

I miss camp. I can’t wait to go next year. I am looking forward to it. Glory to God. Thank you. Be different is a wonderful thing.

When I tell my Aunty melody and my grandma about I want to be a missionary. They seen to be saying something not so good. They say will be suffering from food and suffering. They just don’t understand that we will suffer from this world and we wouldn’t suffer in heaven. If we don’t suffer in this world, I think might be suffering in HELL. They are more on thinking about money. Money cannot bring to heaven but ur heart and soul will be bringing. Oh Lord , please let them understand me.

P.O.D Camp 2008

2008-09-01T20:12:00.000+08:00

Thank you Lord for given me an opportunity to go for this camp. (Point Of Difference). Before I go camp, I have pray this prayer Father Lord this time the title is Point of Difference for this camp. I really want different in me happen. I just want to left everything to u to work through me. I want something to meaningful for me. so that I will always remember. I will let go all my worry and my pass for u. In Jesus name Amen.

I really work very hard to go for this camp. Is worth it that everything I have done. The message really good the words of god really touched my heart. One thing, I have learn was have faith is not a hope but is confident. Well, always in worship time, I feel like crying. Thanks Lord I know that u have touched me, feel me and know what is happening in my life. I know that life is challenge but because of God I need to go on and serve the Lord. I believe in you Lord. I love our puchong cg is great. I have never felt that our puchong is so close just like a family ,brothers and sister. I’m so glad that I join this puchong cg. This puchong cg have teach me a lot, encourage me a lot. I’m also glad that I when for this camp. I know that wherever I go there is always a purpose for it.

Those who when for camp isn’t it great? Is awesome. There is a purpose for each of us. Hope u guy and gal enjoy it.

This verse for this year camp
2 cor 5:6-7
So we are always confident, even though we know that as long as we live in these bodies we are not at home with the Lord. that is why we live by believing and not by seeing.

This is the 1st time I celebrate Merdeka in Genting as in Peaceheaven. We are not just enjoying ourselves there but pray for our nation as in our Malaysia. We also pray for our leader and all of us who is there with me. It was great. Really nice to meet new friends. Thanks you Lord.

To believe

2008-08-13T21:03:00.000+08:00

I have been thinking about it
And I have decide to go tomorrow to register
I really hope this is the right thing I’m doing
I’m scare but Lord
Help me in everything
Let everything to go smooth
My target is a missionary
Even I know go mission is not easy
I know I will suffer
I wiling to go and do it
Heaven is the best place
I want everybody to know about God
However, how am I going to tell others?
Lead me the way Lord
The only I can do
Trust in the Lord
I believe in you

dreams

2008-08-13T20:49:00.000+08:00

Oh Lord, here I am again
More of u Lord
I’m feeling lost again
I wonder what is camp going to be
Seen a bit lost of people
Less people joining
Everybody seen to be very busy lately

I’m sorry lord that I didn’t go church
I really can’t go because of work
I hope to go to learn more gods’ word
Missionary is not easy ok
My dreams Lord
With not why am I on earth for
Therefore the job is for me
I must fulfill it with all my heart
Stop asking me that r u going to do it
Are u going to study nursing
YES!!! Because of the Lord
I don’t care do I have boyfren a not
I go for mission I think single is better
No need to worry too much
I know the Lord will take care of my family
All I need to do is to trust God
Work my very best for it

Someone told me that someone in the hospital that he / she want me to work permanent in this hospital as a personal care assistant (PCA). I really don’t know what am I thinking. Don’t know whether to feel happy or sad? Actually a bit sad like want me to work as a PCA the rest of my life then how am I going to fulfill my dreams.

Mission is my target

2008-08-12T20:49:00.001+08:00

Father Lord, I am really thinking to go and study. The next intake will be in November should I go or wait until 2009. what should I do lord. Somemore sheena is coming in December though of celebrate with my family for this year. I don’t think !!! what is this? Is this what u want for ur life. U know what u want and everybody is supporting u and yet u trying to give up. What is this? Remember what u want to do for the Lord have u forgotten about it? Can I really do it? Even Dr. support me such a wonderful thing happen to me. I’m glad that happen to me. Such an experience for me.

Help me Lord !! I want to go for November been tired being a personal care assistant but work like a staff nurse help me lord to have good result.. I want the license to go for mission.

Thank you Lord

2008-07-30T20:34:00.000+08:00

Wow, now a day I become a translator. DR Jurina always looks for me. It is great that someone appreciate me for something different in life. Thanks god because given me a chance to help people I feel that I’m doing something great. I really feel that life is a miracle. At first, I though nobody cares about and yet I have explain what the Dr wants to tell patient about their condition. The patients say thank you Dr. so I told the Dr that the patient say thank you. Then amazing that the Dr say no I must thank you because you are the one who explain the correct way. I’m so thankful. Oh lord; I really know what is give then to receive. This verse always reminds me that to care for others then yourself. Those who don’t know must start doing it the right way. U did a great job, people will appreciate u.

Lord, I understand that why u have put in at Columbia Asia. Sometimes, I will be asking am I in a right place? What should I do here? My job is not done yet. I will still continue to serve u the way it is. What is right I have to do the best? I know what my life to be. I’m still close to the lord. Muax.. thanks Lord. The patient should thank u.

Remember sumitah always

2008-07-13T10:36:00.000+08:00

Life will go on
Time will pass on and on
Friendship is always there
As long we always remember

No matter where u are
I will always remember u
I am very happy
To know u as a friend

Remember to choose the place wisely
Every place will have different
People, things are different too
Wherever place u go be the best

Remember me ya
I’m a very special girl
Does u want to know why?
I’m grateful to know u
Not easy to know a friend like u
Muaxx

My friend in Columbia asia is living already. I really dunno what to say. I can only say I will miss her a lot..

Release everything to the Lord

2008-07-06T22:49:00.000+08:00

In this world
Nobody understand me at all
I want to be protector
No protection at all

As times come
I felt scare
More and more problem
Is this a challenge for me?

Lord, Are u testing me
Are u helping me
To solve problem
My life I just want peaceful

Why can’t be peaceful
This earth is going evil
Does the world know that?
My job is not done yet

I know the world not going to end
Until I finish my task
What is my task?
Be a missionary nurse

What is a missionary nurse?
Some say tell others about Christ
Half of it is correct
That’s not all

I want to help the sick
By praying
I’m still afraid to pray for others
I need to work on it for my braveness

I wan to go all over the world
People always ask about do u have BF
For me, I don’t think they will accept
How can they accept the gal go all over the world

Dear Lord, as u can see that I’m working very hard at Columbia. Sometimes, not that I wan to complain. I just wan to let it out. I am the person who doesn’t want to keep the problem inside my heart. The more u keeps the more we will get crazy bout it. I don’t wan to go into depression. I’m a nurse need to know how to take care of our feeling. People will always use me but I don’t really bother about it. I’m use to it. They always put me in charge of the whole ward for observation. Is very stressful for me and they give it everything for me to do. They think I’m a super robot. Sometimes I really cannot handle myself.

I need someone to be there to understand me. Hannah do u understands me? You know me very well. If I work means I work my best as in I work very hard even eat also don’t have time. I just feel very unfair to me. When I sit down, they say I’m free no work to do. When other PCA (personal care assistant) they just do nothing and yet they didn’t say anything. One day, I’m busy doing everything I just ask a PCA as in ward aid to help me to take water she say I’m rude to her. What did I do wrong? I didn’t even ask u to walk up and down or help to do observation is considering very good already. Just need to take the flask to put water also so difficult. They can make noise then I also can make noise that observation is not my job. How can people be like that? I just told the person that if u doesn’t wan to do I will do it myself. She said “oh no, I came to work also one”. I work so hard and they can just relax is so unfair to me. Some more can say that I handle the whole ward. Stressful until they also don’t know about it. What I know is they only care about themselves. Oh Lord, when is December? I wan to leave this place very soon. They can just leave everything to me. I know is good that they trust me but I’m very stressful. Worst then study if I may say so myself.

Some people who understand me they say if one day I leave this place I really don’t know how are they going to survive. They depend on me so much sometimes. What I can say I’m the only one ho work the best and very hard working. The sisters also can see one cos they told me. I though they don’t know thanks God for it. At least they are people who understand me and appreciate me.

I’m hungry for God. I’m desperate for u Lord. Needed to be free from it. Help me LORD to release my sadness, angriness cos all I can do now is depend on you lord.

Father Lord, I wan to pray for Hannah that helps her to remember the things that she read. Help her in the exam not to forget anything but confidently to answer. Show her the miracle way. Pray for Florence Lord hope she can get her ticket to come back to Malaysia save journey. Hope that there wouldn’t be any problem cos she really trusts u Lord for everything. I can see that she is really very strong Christian. Help me Lord to release everything that I feel bad bout work. I just wan to leave everything cos I know u r there to help me. thanks lord for everything. I believe in miracle always it does happen to me. thank u lord in Jesus Name Amen.

About my work

2008-07-02T21:18:00.000+08:00

What is this man?
What I want to do?
I really don’t know
Why life so difficult for me?

I know that whatever I do
Is for the Lord
Somehow thinking turns
This is life that always turns

I try to do my best
And yet is my fault
What is my problem now?
Can I let it all out just like that?

Today, I’m working morning. I’m supposed to work evening because of nana taking leave that is why I’m working morning. So, I have to take care of Ward as usual. There people just like to do what they want. They can just relax. For me, I work so hard and yet get scolding from matron and some other people. Sometimes, working no point for me at all. I feel like resigning already. I just want to be peaceful. Why can’t just be peaceful for me. Why am I suffering like that. Oh lord. I can only trust you. What should I do? teach me dear Lord.

Sadly about the place

2008-06-30T19:21:00.000+08:00

I’m sorry Lord.
I feel that I’m away
I’m lost
I’m not close to you anymore then before

Forgive me dear Lord
I really want to be with you always
I dunno why we are so far away
What is my purpose now?

Why people have to let down my hope
I still remember the things happen to me
I want to forget about it
How come still in memory

I’m happy to see my friends in Tung Shin
Sadly about the place there
Remind me so much
I hope this is my last time going there

How to see my friends?
Don’t need to
A few times already
I love my friends so much

Is the place make me sad
Not my friends

Scary day

2008-06-20T12:14:00.000+08:00

Well, I have to set my mind now
Next year must go to study for good
Help me Lord
I must have trust in u

After the incident happen yesterday
I’m realize how important my life is
The guy who disturb which is an Indian guy
He asking me I’m what race so I say
Orang asli funny rite
I try not to say anything about myself
Age haizz.. Not important to tell others also
Girls is very sensitive one
Good thing I run out fast with not what is next
Normally I heard but I don’t really bother
Cos I though it won’t happen to me
And yet this thing really happen
How can this be?

There is a guy at my work place
He wants to ask me out for a date
For me as a friend only
How can I trust him?
He is an Indian
Not that Indian cannot but
If he simply do something to me
What will happen to me?
Difficult to find a good boyfriend
Haizz

Why life so challenge
Can he wait for me
To study
Can he?
Can I trust him?
Oh lord
Nothing on earth is for me
I just want someone there to care for me always
The only person is u lord.
U are the only I can trust
Help me lord
What is my life going to be?

A times of thinking

2008-06-08T11:05:00.000+08:00

What am I thinking now?
Lives still have to go on
No matter where we are
We have to face it

I must have confident for myself
Sometimes I feel that I’m lost
Do I have the faith?
I really don’t know myself

When times I don’t realize it
Forgive me Lord
Now I will concentrate on work 1st
Nothing else to think of

Trust in the lord
He will lead the way for me
I know he will
That’s why I’m on this earth

There is still something
I’m haven’t done
This earth is evil
Times come very fast

Things happen just like that
Earth shaker in country
Water flow just like that
The world is going to end

In times come
Day by day
I have no reason to ask why
I know what I should do

As we grew older
People might be more mature in life
We know what our decision is
Thanks lord

You always in my heart
I have the trust in you
Guide me through
I love you Lord

I have been very busy working for night shift and over time. Wow, this is super busy. This is the first time I get to work 6 night experience. I never work such a long night before. It is an interesting. If u hasn’t tried u will never know how hard it is. For me is just as same as the normal working days but long hours.

I feel that after my night shift, I’m lost it. I’m so sorry God that I don’t have the time for u. forgive me Lord. I know how important you are in my life. When there are times I’m suffering and you are there for me. I know it.

Happy 20th birthday to my best friend

2008-05-25T22:25:00.000+08:00

Happy 20th birthday
I just want to wish u
HAPPY BIRTHDAY
Wow.. we have been godsis many years already
Such a long time we know each other
We never celebrate together so this june
We must celebrate together no matter what
Ur 20th and my 21st
Doesn’t matter who pay ya
All the best for ur exam
I know u can do it
I wan to be a missionary
R u with me?
Wait for u lol
We open a clinic
Why not?
Pead not problem hehe
Hope u enjoy ur day lah..
I know u will
Always remember ur sister is with u
God loves u
God bless ya
muaxxx

21st birthday

2008-05-21T19:26:00.000+08:00

Happy 21st birthday
So happy today
No matter what
I still happy
I want to be the happiest gal in the world
I get older this year
Already an adult
My college mate remember my birthday
I’m so glad they still remember
Though they busy until forgot
They never let me down
I think I should the same
My best friend, thanks so much Hannah
I love u all
Thanks Lord that im still alive until today
I know there is a purpose for me here
My job still not done yet
My dreams still not success yet
I know u r there to encourage me
I know miracle way will happen
If I believe in you
I have trust in u Lord.
I know u have helped me a lot for this few years.
I’m glad to know u
Muaxx

God bless all of you
Happy anniversary 20th to aunty Mag
Unbelievable same day as me
Just only one year younger then me

Happy Nurses Day

2008-05-13T20:48:00.000+08:00

Happy Nurses Day on 12 May
I am a nurse
I want to wish all the nurses
Have a great day
You are doing well in your job
Some people might think it will be an easy
Actually is not easy at all
I know all the hard work
Hoping for everyday going well
Is professional job
We will always remember Florence nightingale
She is the lady of lamp
Some day I want to be like her
However God’s will
Dunno when I can be a successful nurse?
Hope my dreams come true

Happy mother’s day

2008-05-13T20:36:00.000+08:00

Happy mother’s day on the 11 of May
Wish that all mothers will be happier then ever
I love you mummy
No matter where u are I still love you
I know it very well so much
You love me
Sometimes I didn’t say doesn’t mean I dunt care
Wisher everyday will be happier
Having a wonderful life in the world
To me you’re my everything
I want you to be happy
Don’t worry too much on me
I know all that
Please forgive me if I have hurt u mum
I’m sorry
I didn’t mean want to hurt u
Just that sometimes is the feeling that can’t get it off
I know you want to be a nurse when u r young
However u don’t have the chance
Now is my turn to fulfill your dreams mum
I really love this nursing job
I want to be a missionary
However without anything nothing can be done
Is not the time yet
I want to make you proud mum
I just need to trust the Lord
I love you mum
muaxx

After a bad sick

2008-05-13T20:20:00.000+08:00

Why do I have many problems?
Why people think that way
As people grow older
They have more to think about

Why can’t they just live me alone?
All I can do
Just believe in the Lord
Trust in him

Why do I have to care what they think?
Therefore thinking about others 1st
We cannot be selfish
We have to care for each other

Why do I worry about the things which is happening
No matter what I still care for everybody
They just don’t know me well
If they know very well they will understand

I really don’t want to care what is happening now
After this sick I got
I found out that if a person cannot talk
How does it feel?

Ask yourself
Does u try it before?
Is really hard to explain
What u really wants to do?

I have never been so sick before
I also cannot believe myself
Can’t even get the way it is
That show how bad it is

When I was young
I have always ask why this and that
What is I can’t talk or walk?
What my life going to be

However, this time I really understand
Maybe is god’s plan for me
To be me understand what is really life means
No matter what I can only say thank you Lord

In life

2008-05-04T20:44:00.000+08:00

In a way of life
Given me a chance again
Why I don’t receive it as it is
Am I worried about it?

How can I do it?
Trust in the Lord,
Always believe in him
Prayer will succeed with true heart

In a way of life
I need to go on with it
I want to be a successful
Do my best for it

How can I do it?
What is my purpose in life?
Can I fulfill it?
Do I have the courage for it?

In a way of life
In heart to be a missionary
I want to be a nurse
Help the sick people

Thank you Lord
I know you are always there for me
I want to serve him
In mind to think clearly

Future Plan

2008-05-03T20:31:00.000+08:00

I have thought about my life. I want to continue my studies, however, the problem should I retake my BM or just go for a college to study. Seriously, I don’t want any hospital to sponsor me and give me scholarship. I know is good but thinking about it. I’m afraid it happens again like I’m in Tung Shin. Lord, can I really do it? I have told my leader about it.

Finally, I have told him about it. Why I want to be a nurse is because I want to become a missionary not like those who go any where to tell others about Christ. However, I want to help those who are in problem, sick, nobody care for them and I hope I’m able to pray for them. Slowly, I will tell them about Christ and also listen to their problem to understand what they are thinking. This is my purpose and my dreams. I know God have already done so much in life. That’s why I need to fulfill this dream to serve him with all my heart. He says wow you want to be Florence nightingale. I am doing this for God not for myself.

Oh lord, can I really do this? When can I fulfill it? I plan to study and after that work 1st to pay back the money. After that, I have enough to take care of myself. I want to go and help the poor country. I know is not easy but I am going to do it no matter what. I know the devil wills always trying to take me away from God. There are so many times that I blame God. Now, I just want to say sorry. Sometimes, I just dunno what is right and wrong. Izzit my fault? Maybe is not the time yet. I dunno when the right time is. Therefore, I know what I want to be.

I know being a missionary is not easy. That’s why now I am trying to know more about God. Some people just don’t understand. There are many kind of missionary, mine is as I have said above.

I just want to have a prayer here.
Father Lord, thank you for everything. You are always there for me. I’m so sorry Lord about the things I do is not right. Please be able to forgive me. OH lord, Please show me the way to what it should be done. I just want to leave everything to you. Please tell me when the right time is for me. I have been waiting for it. I have been through so much and I know Lord you will let it be true when I believe in it. Lord, what is my plan for this year? I have plan to join the Christmas this year however I’m working can’t even go practice. It seen my plans are upside down. Lord, please give me an answer for it. I’m so desperate Lord. I leave the rest to u all. Thanks Lord for everything.
In Jesus name Amen.

FEAR GOD

2008-04-27T12:50:00.000+08:00

Proverbs 2:2
Tune your ears to wisdom, and concentrate on understanding.

To personally know God, we must know how to fear God. If we don’t know how to fear God then we will keep doing something which is not right such as SIN.

I was upset already that I cannot join Christmas this year. Even audition also cannot go because not every Saturday I can go sometimes I’m working. I really want to put my all for this year. I want to serve the Lord for this year and next year, I really hope I can study a diploma to get a cert and do what I should do. Oh, Lord, what you really want me to do for my life?

That day, actually my friend just become a Christian for about one to two years I think however I know is after SPM only he became a Christian. He thinks that he knows more then me. The problem is if blessing to others is give then to receive but if is god’s words is sure know more about it 1st. why he wants to have fight with me. He doesn’t know how I work as I can say I cannot always go to church. He says must go to church to receive god’s words. However, this job that I work is to serve the Lord. Everything must be slowly and step by step. Yes, is true to go church and receive god’s word. Therefore, does he know that some people go to church just only go to church and go back? If we want to go church is use your heart to praise the Lord and worship him with all our heart. Not just go and back without anything. I have told him that my job not always can go church only when I’m not working I will go. He told to me resign to get a job which can go to church. I really love my job I won’t do this. I have told my self I will do my best for this job.

I have gone through so much. I know that God really want me to be a successful nurse. I really want to go and do missionary to help the sick people and want them to know more about god’s word. What is god’s plan for me? I have take assistant nurse and yet I have fail and I got another chance to Segi College Kuala Lumpur for diploma. Therefore, I have run away cos I don’t like the place. And now, there is a chance for me again. Which is the Columbia Asia wants to sponsor me to studies however I need to take my BM again. Why people just don’t understand me?

FutureLife

2008-04-20T20:32:00.002+08:00

What was I thinking? What is my life? What am I going to do about it? What is the problem with me? I have been thinking so much.. What I really want in my life? I can’t stay my whole life as a PCA (Personal care Assistant) no matter what I have been through. I know God is still there for me. I have pray for it and God always answer my prayer. I’m asking God can I really do it, can I really be a staff nurse? Here comes the chance again. At TSH, I have drop out because I have fail then got into Segi College KL drop out again because of my own problem. I cannot handle it. Can I really be a missionary? I was asking my aunty why I wan to go for missionary. I also dunno why I have been asking myself can I really do it. My aunty told me because I love god so much that’s why I want to go for missionary.

The problem now I have to retake my BM, still have to go and take my BM. Cannot run away from it. Looks like I’m trying to run away from problem haiz…

Yesterday I went back to QHC medical centre to take my stuff. I saw Angela, Christina, priya , nithay and eeranee. They all ask me how is my studies, what can I say I just say ok lol. With not all of them will ask me to work there. Good thing, Christina helps me. Is very wrong to lie. I’m so sorry Lord that I have lie. I really don’t want to lie but really no choice.

Segi College… my friends all miss me. They want me to go and visit them. They also say any time also can visit. What to do I don’t have time. Same as TSH. Thanks Lord. At least I know that they are still people appreciate me.

What is my life going to be? Lord I hope I can take the stress. I know I have drop out and God u are giving me a chance to do it. The Columbia Asia wants to sponsor me to study. Is a sign from u rite?

Sorry lord. Forgive my sin. I know that sometimes I really did very wrong. That’s why this year I want to serve u lord with all my heart. I want to commit myself to u. so no matter what I am going to join the Christmas for this year. Lord I hope no changes for me this year. Is enough for it. I don’t want to change plan already just for this year.

Please Lord; help me to feel comfortable in cell group. Recently like I’m having a bad mood doesn’t know why. Izzit the people there should be lol… I seldom go cg and how to be part of cg. Recently only I commit myself in it. They just don’t understand me. No body can understand me is okay. Help me to do what should I do..

WORK

2008-04-17T19:56:00.000+08:00

Haizz why everyday also so tired, working life is like tat. However, I enjoy it. Today I meet my old friend was meet in tung shin hospital she is working in the hospital with me now.. is really such a small world. One is my church member another was as I have said.

Today, I meet my boss I dunno what position is she. She wan to send to me to study but I have to retake my BM. She say be a PCA no future. Oh Lord, this time I hope I really can pass through if u really wan to send me.

My mother say sure got a lot of ppl jealous one. Haiz what to do wherever I go also got ppl jealous of me. Tung shin, QHC and now Columbia what ability I have until like tat. Thanks God for it.. thanks muaxx I love u lord tats all I can say now…

2008-04-16T20:23:00.001+08:00

Tiring Day

2008-04-16T20:18:00.000+08:00

Wow, wat a week? Dunt even have time to write now a days. Was very busy for my job. Today is my third day in Columbia Asia. Isn’t tat great? Well, is a wonderful to work there actually wherever u work is the same is whether u wan to work there a not to be comfortable. Maybe there is time tat is hard for us but we need to know ourselves for it. I pray tat Lord I will work long for this hospital after tat, please Lord send me to study I really need the cert no matter wat… izzit for me Lord the cert can I do it?

When I work in columbia , I meet my old friends isn’t tat great? Im really hapy to know new friends and meet my old friends, there is one friend which is my church member. Church member seldom see each other in hospital because mostly they will work as business department. Not many people wan to study nursing or even work as a nurse.

I wan to be a nurse because I find tat I am suitable to take of the old people when they are in hospital. I wan to show my love for them. Now I’m in a pead ward, I found out the little children also very nice to take care of it. Must know how’s the technique to take care of them.

Recently, I felt tat something different when I went for CG. Wat izzit? I’m so uncomfortable with it. Why Lord? Izzit time for me to go somewhere else already?
Lord please give me an answer….why in the world there is so much problem for us human? Haizzz….

Finally

2008-04-06T21:31:00.001+08:00

Oh Lord, finally i decide to open this new blog.
i wan to have a new life here.
forget the past shu hui
trust in the Lord always