FEAR GOD

Proverbs 2:2
Tune your ears to wisdom, and concentrate on understanding.

To personally know God, we must know how to fear God. If we don’t know how to fear God then we will keep doing something which is not right such as SIN.

I was upset already that I cannot join Christmas this year. Even audition also cannot go because not every Saturday I can go sometimes I’m working. I really want to put my all for this year. I want to serve the Lord for this year and next year, I really hope I can study a diploma to get a cert and do what I should do. Oh, Lord, what you really want me to do for my life?

That day, actually my friend just become a Christian for about one to two years I think however I know is after SPM only he became a Christian. He thinks that he knows more then me. The problem is if blessing to others is give then to receive but if is god’s words is sure know more about it 1st. why he wants to have fight with me. He doesn’t know how I work as I can say I cannot always go to church. He says must go to church to receive god’s words. However, this job that I work is to serve the Lord. Everything must be slowly and step by step. Yes, is true to go church and receive god’s word. Therefore, does he know that some people go to church just only go to church and go back? If we want to go church is use your heart to praise the Lord and worship him with all our heart. Not just go and back without anything. I have told him that my job not always can go church only when I’m not working I will go. He told to me resign to get a job which can go to church. I really love my job I won’t do this. I have told my self I will do my best for this job.

I have gone through so much. I know that God really want me to be a successful nurse. I really want to go and do missionary to help the sick people and want them to know more about god’s word. What is god’s plan for me? I have take assistant nurse and yet I have fail and I got another chance to Segi College Kuala Lumpur for diploma. Therefore, I have run away cos I don’t like the place. And now, there is a chance for me again. Which is the Columbia Asia wants to sponsor me to studies however I need to take my BM again. Why people just don’t understand me?

FutureLife

What was I thinking? What is my life? What am I going to do about it? What is the problem with me? I have been thinking so much.. What I really want in my life? I can’t stay my whole life as a PCA (Personal care Assistant) no matter what I have been through. I know God is still there for me. I have pray for it and God always answer my prayer. I’m asking God can I really do it, can I really be a staff nurse? Here comes the chance again. At TSH, I have drop out because I have fail then got into Segi College KL drop out again because of my own problem. I cannot handle it. Can I really be a missionary? I was asking my aunty why I wan to go for missionary. I also dunno why I have been asking myself can I really do it. My aunty told me because I love god so much that’s why I want to go for missionary.

The problem now I have to retake my BM, still have to go and take my BM. Cannot run away from it. Looks like I’m trying to run away from problem haiz…

Yesterday I went back to QHC medical centre to take my stuff. I saw Angela, Christina, priya , nithay and eeranee. They all ask me how is my studies, what can I say I just say ok lol. With not all of them will ask me to work there. Good thing, Christina helps me. Is very wrong to lie. I’m so sorry Lord that I have lie. I really don’t want to lie but really no choice.

Segi College… my friends all miss me. They want me to go and visit them. They also say any time also can visit. What to do I don’t have time. Same as TSH. Thanks Lord. At least I know that they are still people appreciate me.

What is my life going to be? Lord I hope I can take the stress. I know I have drop out and God u are giving me a chance to do it. The Columbia Asia wants to sponsor me to study. Is a sign from u rite?

Sorry lord. Forgive my sin. I know that sometimes I really did very wrong. That’s why this year I want to serve u lord with all my heart. I want to commit myself to u. so no matter what I am going to join the Christmas for this year. Lord I hope no changes for me this year. Is enough for it. I don’t want to change plan already just for this year.

Please Lord; help me to feel comfortable in cell group. Recently like I’m having a bad mood doesn’t know why. Izzit the people there should be lol… I seldom go cg and how to be part of cg. Recently only I commit myself in it. They just don’t understand me. No body can understand me is okay. Help me to do what should I do..

WORK

Haizz why everyday also so tired, working life is like tat. However, I enjoy it. Today I meet my old friend was meet in tung shin hospital she is working in the hospital with me now.. is really such a small world. One is my church member another was as I have said.

Today, I meet my boss I dunno what position is she. She wan to send to me to study but I have to retake my BM. She say be a PCA no future. Oh Lord, this time I hope I really can pass through if u really wan to send me.

My mother say sure got a lot of ppl jealous one. Haiz what to do wherever I go also got ppl jealous of me. Tung shin, QHC and now Columbia what ability I have until like tat. Thanks God for it.. thanks muaxx I love u lord tats all I can say now…

Tiring Day

Wow, wat a week? Dunt even have time to write now a days. Was very busy for my job. Today is my third day in Columbia Asia. Isn’t tat great? Well, is a wonderful to work there actually wherever u work is the same is whether u wan to work there a not to be comfortable. Maybe there is time tat is hard for us but we need to know ourselves for it. I pray tat Lord I will work long for this hospital after tat, please Lord send me to study I really need the cert no matter wat… izzit for me Lord the cert can I do it?

When I work in columbia , I meet my old friends isn’t tat great? Im really hapy to know new friends and meet my old friends, there is one friend which is my church member. Church member seldom see each other in hospital because mostly they will work as business department. Not many people wan to study nursing or even work as a nurse.

I wan to be a nurse because I find tat I am suitable to take of the old people when they are in hospital. I wan to show my love for them. Now I’m in a pead ward, I found out the little children also very nice to take care of it. Must know how’s the technique to take care of them.

Recently, I felt tat something different when I went for CG. Wat izzit? I’m so uncomfortable with it. Why Lord? Izzit time for me to go somewhere else already?
Lord please give me an answer….why in the world there is so much problem for us human? Haizzz….

Finally

Oh Lord, finally i decide to open this new blog.
i wan to have a new life here.
forget the past shu hui
trust in the Lord always