Future Plan

I have thought about my life. I want to continue my studies, however, the problem should I retake my BM or just go for a college to study. Seriously, I don’t want any hospital to sponsor me and give me scholarship. I know is good but thinking about it. I’m afraid it happens again like I’m in Tung Shin. Lord, can I really do it? I have told my leader about it.

Finally, I have told him about it. Why I want to be a nurse is because I want to become a missionary not like those who go any where to tell others about Christ. However, I want to help those who are in problem, sick, nobody care for them and I hope I’m able to pray for them. Slowly, I will tell them about Christ and also listen to their problem to understand what they are thinking. This is my purpose and my dreams. I know God have already done so much in life. That’s why I need to fulfill this dream to serve him with all my heart. He says wow you want to be Florence nightingale. I am doing this for God not for myself.

Oh lord, can I really do this? When can I fulfill it? I plan to study and after that work 1st to pay back the money. After that, I have enough to take care of myself. I want to go and help the poor country. I know is not easy but I am going to do it no matter what. I know the devil wills always trying to take me away from God. There are so many times that I blame God. Now, I just want to say sorry. Sometimes, I just dunno what is right and wrong. Izzit my fault? Maybe is not the time yet. I dunno when the right time is. Therefore, I know what I want to be.

I know being a missionary is not easy. That’s why now I am trying to know more about God. Some people just don’t understand. There are many kind of missionary, mine is as I have said above.

I just want to have a prayer here.
Father Lord, thank you for everything. You are always there for me. I’m so sorry Lord about the things I do is not right. Please be able to forgive me. OH lord, Please show me the way to what it should be done. I just want to leave everything to you. Please tell me when the right time is for me. I have been waiting for it. I have been through so much and I know Lord you will let it be true when I believe in it. Lord, what is my plan for this year? I have plan to join the Christmas this year however I’m working can’t even go practice. It seen my plans are upside down. Lord, please give me an answer for it. I’m so desperate Lord. I leave the rest to u all. Thanks Lord for everything.
In Jesus name Amen.