Monday, November 30, 2009

What will be in 2010

What is my life now?

What can I do?


What can I do Lord

I always depend on you

Until now I still do Lord

I don’t know what should do


Father Lord, please be able to help me in my life

I always depend on you

In the father name

Help me in my studies Lord

Now in relationship Lord

My studies must not affect me

Be with me Lord

Forgive my sin


In words may not be shown

In action will do the best

I can only depend on you


You are my everything

ou have shown me the way

Guide me through everything
I am afraid but I trust in you Lord


In holiday but I am very tired

I want to have some rest

With not soon will be very busy for posting

Training may not be in KL..

Might be in Muar..

I know will be a different and challenging

I hope I have a wonderful Christmas and Chinese new year 2010..

What will my new year 2010 will be..

I want to have a change

I want to be different

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

PA Outing

A wonderful Hari Raya Holiday
This is the 1st time I go for camping at Bentong
I have learn to independent when I was outside
Have wonderful holiday with friends especially Poh Ling, Seng Tat and also Mun Kin
Is great to get to know new friends
They are very friendly
Some I don’t even know them
This is the camp from new life which is called PA Outing
Actually I went to this outing there is a reason
God knows it.. I dunno what to say





Sunday, September 13, 2009

Something to believe in

Finally, I have settled with the person
I really hope he can understand me
Hope that he won’t get upset or this and that
Every time, only got his talk
Even that day also I say something sure he say something
Really hurt my feeling
But never mind whatever it is I have done my part
God will understand me
No matter those people don’t understand
I am OK with it
Because I know God understand
God is with me always
I don’t think is important that he listen a not
I have done the right thing I guess

Now, have to concentrate on the semester 3 final exam is on Tuesday
My OKSI is on Wednesday
I pray that God will guide me through with everything
I just have to trust him and God will do the rest
I have done my reading
Help me to remember it Lord, wisdom, knowledge to do it
In a miracle way
Believe and ask for God Helps and seek for him

I have been through all this
Why I can’t everybody can
Something to believe in.. (God)
How to plan for the mission with Poh Ling
I know she is so excited and worry about it
Now I guess she have to start from Adam..
I just have to be with her.
Lord, show me the way how to deal with it
Thx Lord for everything..

Monday, September 7, 2009

Serve the Lord

After have a chat with a leader from new life church

I decide to have a partner which the person is Poh Ling

I want everything to go smoothly

Hope everything will be fine

Guide us through it

I think I have told Joshua but must face to face to speak

Need some advice on it

We are God children no matter where the people choose is ok

Anyway I am going serve both sides

God please give me the strength

Hope that I’m going to the right track

Lead me through

Now I must a good schedule of the things I need to plan

I hope I don’t fall off just like that

I have to build up confident, life, strength and more

I want to be fire on God

I am depending on You

Sunday, September 6, 2009

What Happen??

Just wan to share my feeling since I have enough sleep I guess
Now is already 4am in the morning..
Why I wake up so early having headache now also
If I sleep some more I’m like a pig

Father Lord, I have an experience of the feeling fainting
On the 29 aug I was in genting for the camp DARE TO MOVE…
I only slept for 3 hours I guess
Then I wake up to study and whole day never sleep
After when at night service I was fainted during the service
The feeling was like feeling drizzle, seeing stars all around
After that, I really dunno what happen
By the time I wake im already on the sofa
Two church member carry
I have open my eyes during I fainted and
I know my feet was not on the floor
I couldn’t dare to walk I couldn’t balance myself at all
They decide to carry to my dorm
Since than I feel so sick having so much problem in my life

After camp, means was on the 1 sept I was in college
And I have so called chest pain
I feel that I have something press on the chest couldn’t breath nicely
Slowly I do deep breathing exercise only better a bit
So on the 3 sept was on thurday
I have pain near my scapula and she massage for me
Then I feel a bit hard to breath
So I call seng tat can we just go and eat and I go back but he insist me to go to church
So I went but I was having difficulty so I slept there

I did not talk to jia chuen since Wednesday
That morning is the last talk I talk to him
He is so not matured sometimes
I cannot accept it already
I think I have enough patience with him

On Friday I went my own cell group
I was having back pain but everything was fine at that time
Was talking to my leader
But when they started to worship
I feel very uncomfortable
Hard to breath (SOB) shortness of breath
Then I message Poh Ling
She help to breath nicely
And even she call Seng Tat to pick me up from CG
Then they decide to send me to Hospital (UM)
Everything was ok
Pulse rate was a bit high
The x-ray was ok
Everything was ok just hard to breath
Is so called hyperventilation
The cause is Stress and something trying to stop me
To fulfill my mission
This is what my mum told me
I guess so
Emily calls me and asks how check up
Then I call Joshua to tell him cos he is my leader
He didn’t know anything
Why u didn’t tell me
I know if like that they will also send me to hospital
But is ok.. Poh Ling will take care of it

Thanks to everyone who cares for me
My life in hostel and at home the same I just can’t stand it
Here and there got argument
They only think about themselves
Who think about me
Making problem only
Lead me to a conclusion of success
Nobody thinks about me..
Hope I’m not going for depression

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Miracle

Dear Father Lord,

Suddenly I just feel like writing out a poem

However, I really don’t know what to write

I feel sorry for my friend’s mother

The mother got this cancer of the colon

Then after that she have done the operation

It was success but only for three to four months

However, it have gone to 6 moths already

God have make miracle in her life

Hope that he is able to prepare himself

And on the 11 Aug 2009 at 6 something in the morning have pass away

I actually when my friend told me about septicemia

I already know it’s not long

I know the condition very well

This is about the Blood problem

However I just don’t know how to say

However my friend have the hope

What I think same as my mother

If the person so suffering

Why not God take the person to heaven

So that she have happy life there

She won’t be on earth so suffer with all the mesin

I know that God will take care of her

I love you Lord to take care of her

No matter how long I know her

Even I know her for few minutes

I still love her as my family

I just don’t know how to show her Love

I know God has a way

I believe in that

I pray that God will be able to take care her

Oh Lord pray that you will help my dear friend

To be ok soon

I want to see him happy like last time

Always make fun of me

Always there to help me in everything I need

No matter I know him for few months

He is my brother in Christ family to me

Heal him and build him up in everything

Thanks you Lord…

Sometimes I don’t understand

I know my parents worry about me

Therefore scare the children get sickness

Such as H1N1

Well, what I think that

Is true that we need to protect ourselves

However things that u wants to avoid

Sometimes the more u avoid the more will get

I believe that God will protect us

He will lead me the way

He know what should I do

He knows when I knew to leave

He knows when my job going to finish

I will going for mission

Sure there is a lot of sickness

I will be going through

This is really true

Now just let everything go through like that

Trust in the Lord

He will lead me through whatever what I need to go through

Thanks Lord for everything

Love you

Sunday, August 9, 2009

Sensitive Issue

Oh Father Lord

Today I am quite happy can meet back Chee Yee.

She is ok only that sometimes she just like to control people.

We have talk a lot of things today

After that, I feel bored also cos only both of us.

Suddenly there is a friend say about which Church is better.

I just don’t understand

Do not judge other people

We know ourselves, and we are not perfect at all.

God is the one who will Judge us when the end of the earth

In revelation God have mention in the Bible

Is ok he is still new believer

Must be patience ok…

What I think about that

Anywhere you feel comfortable then is good

Do not judge saying that this church feel more like Family

It is ourselves how you bring yourselves up in Christ

What you think and what you think about the Lord

You must know your God

Which one is the right one

There is only one God

Do not serve other God is enough already

This is a very sensitive issue

I just do not know how I should say already

He haven’t even join my church before

Forgive others and God will forgive us

Good things sya understand my feeling

Do not mention so much about religion

Oh God!!! Very upset to heard that

For my studies

Help me dear Lord to guide me in every way

Show that there is a different in me

I can do it Lord

Whatever it is I will just listen what you say

I want to listen to your words

Sure there is a lot of these things happen

Spiritual warfare ya… it is not easy lol

Whatever he don’t understand

Forgive him Lord.

Really hurt my feeling..

I don’t know why

Because this church have brought me up

I have learn quite a lot of things of there

Thanks you Lord for there to be with me

Lead me to more ways Lord

I want to continue my life as a missionary

I want to serve you..

Show me the way

Monday, August 3, 2009

Free from Exam

Proverbs 29:25 – 26
It is dangerous to be concerned with what other think of you, but if you trust the Lord, you are safe.
Everybody wants the good will if the ruler, but only from the Lord can you get justice.


What I think this verse really speak to me.
It is true about that.
Think about this verse and is very meaningful to me

After exam was super free
Was sick whole week
What a week of sick
Hopefully can see Doctor today
What is life now
Lean me through the way in miracle
Guide each of my friends to goods of way
Finally I am able to write my blog
Such a long time didn’t write my blog
There are many things happen in my life
I really I dunno where to start

My hostel
Well, I trying my best to solve the problem
Whatever they want to do let it be
I’m just too tired to think and help them
It seen to make so much problem of it
My tears have been running out
Ever since I come in to this college
Every time I try to help them to solve and
They seen to make problem every time
How come they are not tired

There is one Christian
They way she act really not like Christian
Whatever I just don’t want care
She is like find me stupid
When there is something she wants
She will come to u
If not she don’t even care for you
She only think about her problem
So selfish
Human are seriously not perfect at all
But some how I just can’t stand it
No matter how many times I help her
She doesn’t care but only herself
What I know now.
God knows everything
God will help her in everything
Thanks Lord

I am truly very upset about that
But I always remember to forgive others
And God will forgive you rite
It is really true
Thanks god I still have some outside friends who care for me
Thanks Lord for those who care for me.
This is not end of the world yet

Now I am worried for my college
There are people in college got H1N1
Protect us Lord to go through all this.
I trust in you Lord
In everything you are there for me

Have a great day

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Miracle way

Quite a long time

Didn’t have the time to write my blog

I really miss my blog a lot

Recently preparing for exam

And I’m super tired for it

Exam is end of the month

I pray that God will be able to guide me through all this test

Very challenger but I believe that God have plans for me

This sem is a bit stressful

All I can do now is study and the rest leave everything to him

He will make a way for me

He love me so much and I love him very much

He is my everything

Without him I won’t be able to reach until here

Properly still hanging around in Columbia I guess

Thank you Lord


My dearest Hannah have left me to Australia

My best best friend or I should call her as my Godsister

She is my family and really close to each other

Everything we do together

However now she is away

She still there to encourage me


My dearest Sheena is back

Unable to see her yet

Cos she is going to have holiday with her family

Just hope to see her before she goes back to Australia

She always encourage me and with tears of Love

I just dunno how it happen but it really happen

Thank you Lord for making so much differents in my life

In a very special way I love you Lord


In times of life

I cannot understand

But God lead me through everything

I trust in him


He have given me miracle happen

In my family

Im so thankful and so happy

I just dunno how to explain it


Things happen and in different way

Thank you Lord

All happen and tears with love

The Love of God

Saturday, July 4, 2009

Spiritual

Oh Dear Father Lord
I was really very down that day
I am totally very useless that I feel
However, u have not given up on me
You have given me so much hope
U send people to build me up
I thank you Lord for everything
I realize that you are so amazing to me

That day I friend have a problem between her old religion
Therefore u have show her the way
Though that I have some problem between our friend
And yet I have forgive him
Now is the time there have to settle it themselves
I can only do things till here
Others I can only depend on you
I am so glad you are always there for me

Oh Lord, I remember that you have given me break through
For this week and so many times
I know that God u have show me that u really care for me
You have show me so much about life
You have teach me so much
I think is really miracle that you guide me through everything

Now Lord I have to depend on you on my exam
I am working hard on it
I have done my best and the rest I leave it to u Lord
I know that you will be there for me

Help me Lord
Give me the strength to go through all this
Without you what is life all about
But with you life so interesting in me
I wan to thank you Lord for everything

Sometimes I really dun understand the senior
They dun like to work with me
But ended up yesterday was the last day with them
One of them seen to enjoy working with me
Is ok that show that how God work through me
I am so thankful to u Lord.
I love you Lord so much
I have gain my challenger and I know there is more
Thank you Lord
Amen

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Good News

Oh father Lord, thank you so much for letting me share to my fren
I know that I am not the one to bring her to Christ
However u are the one who lead me to
I am glad she is able to accept u as Lord and savior
Oh Lord lead her to a new life
Change everything to be better for her
I know there will be challenger coming to her
Lord to show her the way and guide her in everyway
Take care of her Lord

She haven’t tell her parents about it
Continue to guide with the right time for her to speak
In a miracle way to bring her family to Christ
It is totally not the easy way
I am willing to do my best to help her
Dear Lord lead me and her to do what we should do

Dear Lord, help my dear fren mun kin to understand what is Jesus all about
I believe one day he is able to accept u as Lord and savior
Lead him and help him to understand u more Lord
Even he have gone to church for two years
Continue to show him more
Thank you Lord for everything
Things become more and more better in Christian walk
I have faith in You Lord

Father please forgive my sin
I am a sinner
Even I am a Christian a long time
I am so not sure where I am going to be
Therefore I want to commit myself to you
Help me to do what I should do
Especially when I was in hostel
Lead me to show how a Christian should be
Control my temper Lord
I know sometimes people cannot be trusted so much
But Lord please lead me to let them believe in me
Let them ask me more about Jesus Lord
It seen some of them got some problem but I dunno how should start
Thanks You Lord

Even sometimes I am a bit stressful
Lord please help me calm down
Show in a beautiful to lead me through this course
Sometimes I just dunno what to do
I believe and have faith that I have to finish this course
Lord I am sure you know why
Because of u Lord
I am doing this studies for u
To be a ble to lead myself to be a missionary
I guess now is the time for me to bring myself up
I know that God really love each one of us in a different way
Thank you Lord for everything

Saturday, May 30, 2009

BDAY 2009

Finally I am back to my house in puchong. I am having great time in training and my birthday on the 21 May at the age of 22 years old. I feel so old wei..

Anyway, I just to make myself clear about this year for my birthday wish.

Some people say we should not say it out until it works.

I don’t mind about it. This is to make myself clear.

I must change my attitude to be a better person.

I want to be a good student in college

I want to be the best in college.

To show the people who look down on me.

Thank you father lord to be there to listen to me always.

Problem is always there and we have to solve it with a professional way.

As a good nurse..

When I tell my friend about that and he say wah esthery have grown up already.

I was like oh not all the while like that meh. Maybe I think

Any way there is some photo to share












Posting

My first week of posting in PKKN is mostly for patient who have leprosy, tuberculosis and also HIV. I was in charge to take care of patient who has leprosy which is already negative which not spread already. The patient there are some which don’t have legs and hands, some even got psychology problem like mental. Really all kinds of things we see in the place. Some of them, which don’t have legs and hands, they even help each other to wash their plates, bowls and cups. They are really nice and helping each other and also they do fight and scold patient not nurse because some of them really a bit of problem like psychology.

In this place, I learn something is a reminder to me. They have no legs and hand and yet still they can live their life for so many years already more then 50 to 60 years. Some of them help to cook dishes when they feel like to cook. They really felt like home. I learn that sometimes we have problem to us like a big problem but we couldn’t help it like we so tension with it. However, imagine for these patients who have no hands and legs because of nerve did not flow well and cause damage already. To what I think is that their problem is bigger then us because is their whole life. Ours was only can settle or leave it just as is. I am seriously very proud of them. Is great that we know there are people who are like and yet they can take care of themselves. Now generation have change is different then before.

My second week on the 1st week of posting. Oh lord, today is not my day. I am supposed to work at afternoon but suddenly early in the morning, the people message me at 7:30am expect me to go now. Four of us, have to call here and there to know which ward, which CI, which place really make my day. I really don’t understand why they have to give information last minute on the doe.go late and come back early, there are nice senior that we join. Thanks Lord for everything no matter I still love you muax..

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Worship







Oh dear Lord
What will happen to me when posting
I wan everything to go through perfectly
In a miracle way
I always believe in the Lord
Nurses day will be celebrate on the 20th May
So sad Saturday got posting
Wan everything to be great for next week

Worship

Worship is an emotional response
Directed toward God
Involving the whole body
Environment
Because of his holiness and his grace

Who do you worship?
How do you worship?
Where do you worship?
Do you worship God other then cg or church?
To let u think about it

Thank you Lord

Saturday, May 9, 2009

Early Celebration Birthday

This is our day off for early celebration birthday
Is our wonderful day
We really enjoy ourselves
At last we brought quite a lot of things hehe
Life is worship
Worship is very important
It is deep in our heart to worship the Lord for true heart
True worship
Great worship deep in our heart








Puppy

The little puppy I my grandma house so cute like baby











Dad’s birthday cake

On day out

On a Sunday that suddenly
We plan to go out for shopping
Not real shopping but window shopping
Haha..end up did not buy anything hehe cool huh

We told photo in IOI mall wow
This is Melissa Choo and her brother and also me


We went out together

Thursday, May 7, 2009

How beautiful my mum is

To a lovely mother in my life
Described my mum
She is a wonderful mum in my life
She is the most beautiful person in this world

No matter how things goes wrong
She is still able to hang in there
This is because god is with her
She believe God can make miracle happen

Sometime I am so impress by her
I wonder can be like my mum
She is a very understanding person
She is able to control her temper

In my life, I haven’t seen a person
Which is almost as perfect as she is
This is because God work through her
God have shown her so amazingly

We want to say sorry to our mother
Due to sometimes we in wrong
Sometimes we didn’t respect and angry with her
We want to take this opportunity to say SORRY

We also want to take this opportunity say THANK YOU
For the things she have done for us
Because of both us, she have suffer so much
She have made our life so wonderful

We love you so much
Sometimes we don’t really show
However in our heart
You are wonderful and beautiful like an ANGEL

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Why like that? Sad!!!

Oh Lord I wonder how long I can stand this friend
I try my very best to be a good friend
He just like to argue with people
My friend also feel the same
I’m so tired to entertain him already
He like to make his own choice for people
I hope Lord please guide me to be more patient
I dun no what else can I do
He only wanna follow up this and that
I know he love God so much but also got timing
To him Jesus is coming
Yes , I know but when people cannot accept
We cannot force people
We only can try our best and God will do the rest
Why can’t he just understand this point
I just don’t know what is gone into him
He think is easy to get a non-christian to Christian
For me, it is also not easy to ask them to go
There is always the timing to do things
I am going to be Crazy but his attitude
Oh Lord, what should I do
No matter what I tell him to be patient need to wait
And yet he say no no no..
Jesus is coming, he told me
Yes, but cannot force people ok ok ok..
How to tell him
Nothing is easy unless God made it to be

I wanna cry Lord
I have my own problem
My studies and my result not in good shaped
However this guy keep disturbing me
I think I am going into depression soon
I don’t want things to be happen like Tung Shin
I don’t want Lord
This far I have gone through
Please do lead me to the end Lord
I try my best to have happy day
And yet it seen cannot be help
I can only depend on u Lord

Happy Birthday Angeline..
Have a great day..

Thank you Lord for everything muaxx

Monday, May 4, 2009

My problem

Today, I finally spend sometime to do some notes for two subject
There is a guy ask me to be his girlfriend and he is waiting for the answer
However, we know each other for maybe hmm since form 1 till now
He is younger then one year but I really dun have the feeling for it
How am I suppose to tell him the answer
Every time, we meet also we argue one
Even Yesterday also he call me and also we argue
He ask me out to watch movie with him alone
How can? To me I cannot do it. I am scare
I dun wan to give him hope
I am really just think he is just a friend to me
It is very difficult for to tell him
Oh dear Lord, I pray that soon my prince will come to me
I wan the prince which I can love him and also he love me
For now, I dun wan to think about relationship between girl and boy
I wan my future to be success first
Even I dun have also I am ok with it. Ya I am desperate but let it be my dream
I wan to fulfill my future and be a missionary
Others let God think for me
I wan some one to come with me to the missionary field (nurse and doctor)
In my mind, I dun wan doctor to be my future dream
Because due to some thing that I have seen which I think dun need to be
What is in my mind now?
Why when I tell people about my problem can’t they just understand me?
Oh Lord for me is very difficult to find a person to listen to my problem.
I also dunno why I got some much problem
In this world, there are things happen just like that
There is always a reason as I told myself to remember
I just have to depend On God

Thanks Lord

Saturday, May 2, 2009

In Cova






The lake behind my hostel

My best friend Hannah and me

My hostel swimming pool which is Cova



My hostel housemate


Me


Yana and me



Yana and me

Friday, May 1, 2009

Happy Labour Day

Happy Labour Day
Is the day of everybody having holiday
There is where the family get together
Spend the time together

Father, I want to have a friend which is not a christian
Yesterday my friend and I bring her to CG at New life Church
I really hope that one day she will be able to accept what is Jesus all about
Is great to join them for CG I found that is a bit different
However I would is really comfortable with that
Pray that gives her the confident to accept Jesus as saviour
In Jesus Name Amen

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Exam Mid Term

Father, I really have no idea for this semester 2.
I am afraid but now I have trust in the Lord
All I have to do is do my best in everything
God will do the rest as always
God have mention it many times
I have to keep repeating to myself as a reminder
Help me lord.
I will always remember this verse
John 14:1
Do not let ur heart be in trouble
Trust in the lord and also believe in Jesus..
Thanks Lord..

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO JOAN
Really missing her so much
Enjoy working with her hehe..
Muaxx..

Thank you Lord
I love you
Take care

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Thank you Lord

Finally my result is out. I am so happy

I want to thank for those who help me

Especially God, because he keep letting me believe in him

I did not know that I did not bad.. I love you Lord

This verse keep reminder me about it

John 14:1

Do not let trouble in your heart,

Trust in the Lord and also believe in me.

Now the most important thing I have to start preparing for Sem 2 mid term

The lecturer got high expectation on me

So pressure, tension, stress

Working on it to make myself more confident

There is one friend saying that I am giving the person excuse

The person just don’t understand

It takes me for few months to get back confident

And going on the right track

The person was saying everyday say busy why now still can online

Mostly I will online and also doing my assignment and home work and studies together

Don’t judge people on the outside but look the inside before you say anything

Dunno how many times I have repeat what I say

My schedule is very pack

Mon till Friday is 9 am till 5pm for classes reach hostel already 6am

Normally I will wash my clothes 1st then rest sometimes cook for the housemate to eat

By the time everything settle is already 8pm or 9pm

Not only one subject I have to study is four subjects this semester

All this subject need to memorize one not as the 1st semester

Really scare to drop the marks

I don’t even have the time for myself

Why can’t the person understand me

So angry say I giving excuse.

Thank you Lord for everything you have done for me

I will continue to do what I should do

And always remember that what is my dream

muaxx